Still Here

[mik]

Hello everyone.

Just a short note to let you all know that I am still here. I havent posted as of late, but have been spending time reading others accounts of losing loved ones and the skills they are using to cope. Looking back at some of my first posts, I can see a change in my perspective and also how I am feeling. I know that grief comes and goes, however I am beginning to heal. I do have to say in my crisis..for lack of a better word that it was all about me...I failed to see others grief as a tool in which I could form a bond..I don't know if anyone else has experienced this? I work with people and have counseled others and I am used to putting other individuals problems ahead of my own. I guess what I am saying is I failed to really reach out to anyone in THEIR suffereing as I was too wraped up in my own. I do feel guilty about this..but will chalk it up to my own grief clouding my ability to do this. Everyone here has been so supportive and this site has been a godsend to me. I wish to thank everyone for their input and I will continue to be here and hope that I can impart the same wisdom that you have bestowed upon me. If feels good to be calmer and a littl more like myself again. To others going through this..my prayers and wishes for peace of mind for you. Thank you all....

Kim

[kayc]

Kim

It's good to hear from you and it sounds like you're doing better. Don't be surprised if it's a bit up and down for a while, that's just how it is. Yes, when we are grieving, it IS all about us. We become self-absorbed like babies again, temporarily, how can we be otherwise? We've had such a traumatic shock to our system it takes everything within us to survive it, process it, and deal with it...it's tough at best. But usually it results in our becoming more sensitive and compassionate in the long run as we learn so much through going through our grief journey. Another silver lining I noticed was I learned to really stand up for myself in ways I never had to before. I see that as a good thing.

Don't waste energy feeling guilty, just chalk it all up to a learning experience, it is, it's a huge one.