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Found this week a tough one, it was three months since I lost my other half. The days are gettting lighter but I find myself thinking of all the things I am missing about him. I would like to:

Just have another chat to you

Just have you hug me

Just be able to walk down the road with you holding my arem

Just do up your shoes for you because you couldnt reach down

Just rub your knees with cream when they felt stiff

Just make you a cup of tea first thing

Just sit with you and watch the sport

Just discuss anything that is worrying me with you

Instead, all I can do is cry, miss you with every breath I take and hope and pray it gets easier .


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Dear Susan,

I would love to have all those same things that you would like to have. My wife Pauline passed last February 25,2011. It is not easy to go forward into a new life without them. She made me promise her I would. She had, Multiple Sclerosis for many years. I was her soul care giver. It was en stage MS that she passed from. One thing MS done for us, was we had time to talk and plan out everything. We left nothing unsaid. It is still very painful, but for her I go on. I am now in nursing school and doing very well. I cannot fail. I never failed her in 33 years. I focus on all the great times we had in our life, that gets me through, not the end of her life and her loss. If we stay there it is very hard to come out into the light of life, the land of the living. It is very hard work to do. Take your time, focus on yourself, eating healthy, sleeping, exercise, it all helps to bring life back into you. Be gentle on yourself. Try to find a local hospice support group. Talking face to face with people who are going though the same thing really helps. I hope you will find peace and comfort.

God Bless


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Oh Susan, you said all the things I too feel. Bless you heart. I am so sorry for you loss and share your pain. I wish I could say that the missing has gotten easier for me, but I don't really think it has. I think my emotions are not as raw as they were when Dick had only been gone 3 months. For me, acceptance and acknowledgement has begun to settle in. After almost 4 years, I believe I am "getting used" to the feelings of loss and loneliness. It still hurts, but it's not the punch in the gut it used to be.

This site has been a life saver for me. I know that I am not alone. I am not the first person to have these feelings and to honestly believe I was losing my mind and probably needed to be locked up somewhere.

Hang in there, go ahead and cry all you want, yell, scream, do all those things, but don't stop sharing how you are feeling. Sharing does help us cope.

Be gentle with yourself,


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Me too.

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Susan I am sorry for your loss.I feel your pain. I share all those wants you have.I too lost my other half,Kathy,on oct21, 29 years I was blessed with her presence.I chose to stop the pendulum on the clock, so I wouldnt have to hear the tick or the ringing. One day I wont mind but not today.youre right 'Do the next thing'.Baby steps. lance

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