Lost My Boy 9 Weeks Ago

[belgmalilover]

I'm new to this board, or any board for that matter, so I don't really know how this works. I do know that I'm in a lot of pain and that that the way I've been 'dealing' with it is to just not stop moving. I'm not leaving my house but I am just in constant motion doing one thing or another. I'm only sleeping 3 out of 7 nights a week and by that I mean that I am up doing something...mostly organizing and re-organizing my house.I had to stop working doing dog training for now. I'm not able to watch the news, read the paper or even read things that would be helpful for me. When it gets to be about 8PM I get energy to just stay up all night. When dawn arrives I'm glad that the night is over and try to enjoy that blessed time of day. I don't know if I can go on writing now. Everything feels so abnormal. I had to euthanize my dog 9 weeks ago because he had an inoperable stomach cancer (he was 13). My other dog is also ill, suffering from a vaccine-related auto-immune disorder. One of the meds they put her on put her into liver failure so I've been exerting a lot of energy helping her to heal and hopefully not die. I don't know where I'm going in this post...maybe not too bad for my first try. I don't seem to be getting any better, especially because my young dog (4 y.o.) is ill and we are unable to have our usual routine of training and competeing in dog agility. I don't even want to go to the trials to support my friends... Elizabeth

[tattoodlb]

Hi Elizabeth,

I can share in your painful feelings right now. I know what you mean about "keeping moving", I am keeping myself very busy as well, mainly because when I stop, the feelings flood in and take over and I cry. Mostly, I cry myself to sleep over the loss of my beloved furry friend. He had severe lung cancer (you can check out a previous post so I don't repeat here) and it was so sudden, like a tidal wave. I had absolutely no indication he was sick at all until it was too late, and I am VERY observant when it comes to my furry family members as they depend on us for everything. (my husband calls me anal when I fuss over any abnormal behavior in my pets).

I'm sorry for your loss and this forum is an excellent place to be, and you are here with us now because you are meant to be here and there are awesome participants who will offer all kinds of moral support. I also posted here when my mom died a few years back (has it been that long already?!) and I feel very comfortable sharing here and I hope you do, too.

I hope you find peace in sharing and reading posts from others.

[Rameyw]

Elizabeth,

i am soooo very sorry for the loss of your "fur kid". Today marks 1 month that I lost my beloved mare, Maria. She was my heart and soul and I HAD to release her because of a broken leg. She was only 8 years old and was my dream from when I was a very little girl. I had waited 28 years for her to "arrive" and when she did I knew that this was IT for me. I lost her mother 2 years ago and I thought that I would have Maria for at least another 20 years. NO DEAL! I know how empty and lost you feel and I'm not going to say it will get better soon because I still am not better. I will think that I am but then I get that empty feeling. I have to go to my barn everyday and take care of 8 other horses twice a day and I have to FORCE myself to go there. I go out of duty to the others there because THEY need me and they don't understand. I'm rambling sorry, but please know that I care and know how you feel.

Please take care,

hugs coming yor way,

Kelly

[leftbehind]

I'm so sorry you lost your beloved pet. I've lost several over the years and it never gets any easier. We love them so much and it's so hard to let them go. It will take time but it will get easier. I hope your other dog gets well soon. Hang in there.