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Celene's First Anniversary

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Last Wednesday was the One-year Anniversary of Celenes passing. Ciara and I choose to make a trip to San Diego California for the week. San Diego was one of Celenes favorite places to visit. She loved any chance to interact with animals, both of land and sea. Ciara and I made certain to spend time at Sea World, San Diego Zoo and San Diego Wildlife Park. The week started off with my birthday on the 6th and ended with, what would have been Celenes 42nd birthday.

I started Wednesday morning enjoying Celene's favorite breakfast, then visiting with all the animals she enjoyed spending time with; especially the giraffes and rhinos. Ciara and I even had the opportunity to feed and pet the giraffes and rhinos. Later that evening, we had dinner at her favorite restaurant in Little Italy. I thought that I would have felt some sort of connection to Celene while in San Diego. I am not sure what I was expecting, I just thought I would feel some type of personal connection. It was pleasant to see our daughter Ciara enjoying the interaction with the animal. She reminds me so much of her mother. There were moments of sadness, when I recalled the times Celene and I shared at specific locations.

On Saturday, Celenes birthday, the hotel that we stayed at had two wedding ceremonies. Both could be seen from our balcony, so Ciara and I watched as the bride and grooms said their vows. The part that hit home to me was: Till Death Do You Part. I know when I heard those words at our wedding, they were only words. When I heard them on Saturday I couldn't help but think how true they are.

When I arrived home last night, I stared into Celenes picture, stroked her urn, and talked to her for a moment about how much I missed her in my life. When I woke this morning, I felt unwilling to do anything.


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Reading this brought me to tears. I give you credit doing all you did. (I'm not there yet). Those words, "Til death do you part" - powerful. I have my sister's wedding to go to this weekend. Thank goodness I'm not in the wedding party. This will be so hard for me. Playing all the love songs, etc. I'm going to be a cryng mess :(

We won't ever feel the same will we...just get through things.

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I remember feeling angry hearing those words (til death do us part) because I hadn't wished it and didn't see how something beyond our control could rip us apart. Am still not sure I agree with it, because in my mind's eye, we haven't "parted", we're only temporarily away.

Your birthday is the day before mine then...I'm glad you got the chance to be with your daughter in such a beautiful place. I have only been to Sea World once and totally loved it. I have a feeling I would have loved your wife...

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