Rodney Posted January 17, 2013 Report Share Posted January 17, 2013 Sunday morning my 12 year old Boston Terrier Maggie started having a violent seizure, I was terrified and didn't really know what was happening. Since it was Sunday I knew my vet's office was closed but found an emergency vet's office open and rushed her there, the seizure started around 7:45am, even though I tried to get her help immediately I didn't get her to the emergency vet until about 8:15am. And she was having a seizure the whole time. After about 15 minutes in the back room the vet came out to talk with me. She told me that Maggie was sedated but because this was her first seizure and she is over 12 years old that her outcome was not going to be good. The vet said that Maggie probably has a tumor that is causing the seizure, and that even if they can get her stable that she will have another seizure whether the next day or maybe even 5 days later, but that she would have another. Once she suggested euthanasia I broke down in tears. Even though she was almost 13 years old, she has never shown any signs of age, she was just like a happy healthy puppy. Since it was an emergency vet's office they are very expensive, it was going to cost around $1600 to keep her alive for the day. Financially that would have been extremely hard for me but I would have put it on a credit card if necessary, but the vet made it clear that even after that cost Maggie was most likely going to die. I didn't want my little Maggie to suffer. I was allowed to stay with her for a few hours to try to figure out what I should do. The drugs she was given was Valium and Phenobarbital. This is where I am confused, as the Valium and Phenobarbital would where off she would start to wake up, they said she is starting to seizure again, now I understand that I am not a vet, but even though sometimes it did look like a seizure, sometimes it just looked like she was waking up from a traumatic occurrence. I would never want my baby to suffer any pain so when she started to whimper and tense up again, I told the vet to go ahead and euthanize her. Maggie and I were extremely close friends, she was my entire life. I did everything for her and she was always there for me. I am completely lost without her, it has now been almost 4 days and I still can't even eat, I have lost interest in everything and crying now hurts so bad that I can hardly breathe. I can't stop second guessing my decision, did I kill my baby? I have done some research online about tumors in older dogs and she didn't have even one of the symptoms mentioned. I know something caused that terrible seizure but could it maybe have been something less fatal than a tumor? They did do blood work and didn't find anything with that. I can't stop thinking that maybe she could have lived. Losing her has been more unbearable than I could have ever imagined, my guilt is so overwhelming. Thank you for your time, Rodney Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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