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The Holidays

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My mom died last october and my dad passed away this past June. This is the first year where they'll both be gone. I've been very withdrawn lately i dont want to be with anyone for the holidays, I just want to be alone and I dont even really care about decorating my first apartment or putting up a tree. I'll figure out a way to afford to give everyone christmas presents. But I just want to do it early so everyone will leave me alone on Christmas Day. I didn't have a choice last Thanksgiving and Christmas because I was in foster care. I'm not sure what's bringing this out in me. My house is being sold the one i grew up in and I'm not sure if that's what's bringing this out or what. What do I do? I miss my family. I miss being happy and really caring about things.

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I too, just lost my father (my mother died sixteen years ago) and I am in the process of selling the family home that I grew up in. It has such a finality to it. Under the circumstance, you have every right to not want to celebrate. I hope that in time, you will want to. I still miss my mother every Christmas. My mother had a zest for life. She wouldn't want me to grieve and be sad on the holidays. I celebrate to honor her.

You don't have to celebrate, but do something for yourself. Curl up with a good book or movie or whatever it is you like to do to escape.

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