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4 Year Mark On Valentines Day


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Well today is as expected, I woke and within moments I was a flowing river of tears...I don't why I expected it would be different, maybe because I wore myself out last night umpiring my first High School Baseball game (yes, at 56 I'm back in Baseball it was a blast, more later) and figured I'd be to tired today to notice, sure don't know how I had that idea...so I took things head on as I have been...I wished her Happy Valentines Day gave her a hug as she is in her special shrine, then I had this crazy thought to visit her Facebook page and post a message, I have it in memory status so I can re-visit our timelines from past...It was nice seeing all the friends posts, another rolling river of tears...I wanted to share with everyone here as these total spontaneous things I do to handle this continued grief have a great impact in moving me past the waves...I encourage everyone to " go with the flow " even if it seems crazy because we really have nothing to loose by trying...here is my post to Ruth for Valentines Day...I also found this piece of scripture it is so fitting and calming...and notice the book it came from...

To GG, Ruth, My Wife...It's so hard to imagine 4 years have gone by since you left to be with God and the Angels...as you see daily I'm doing well, I still miss you like no one will ever know...today was our special day as was each we spent together...I wanted to post you a "Happy Valentines Day My Sweetheart" forever and always in my Heart, Mind, Body, and Soul.

All My Love

"Ask me not to leave you, or to return from

following you. For where you go, I will go.

Where you lodge, I will lodge.

Your people shall be my people and your God,

my God. Where you die, I will die and there will I be buried. May the Lord do so to me,

and even more, If anything but death,

part you from me"

Ruth 1. 16-17

May You All Find Comfort Today

NATS

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NAT, I am thinking of you today on this anniversary and am especially sensitive to your pain as the 4th anniversary of Bill's death approaches next month. I do know and you do also that grief catches us off guard, surprises us and leaves us scratching our heads sometimes. Just when we think we are on top of things, wham...there it is as it appeared to you today. I totally respect your tears and your pain and just know you are thought of today.

Peace to your heart,

Mary

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Nat, I am also thinking of you, and loved what you posted. I also post on Mike's Facebook page, which I too had memorialized. My four year anniversary of being without Mike was January 13, just about a month longer that your 4 years without Ruth. I remember back in April of 2010 you were one of the first to respond to my posts when I joined this site. You have such a good heart, and my prayers are with you today.

Mary (Queeniemary) in Arkansas

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My heartfelt sympathy and condolences, Nat.

This is my first Valentins day without My Paula.

I too have been in tears and agony most of the day and last night.

I fully understand and hope you find the comfort you seek.

Chris

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Nats, no matter how hard today is for the rest of us, it has to be all the more so for you, you are in my thoughts and prayers today.

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Thank you all for the kind words and thoughts...the day was full of emotions as is today and I'm sure the next few will be...

I will settle as the days unwind, I'm focusing on the positive energy Ruth instilled in me using it to the fullest extent...

May Peace Be With All Of You

NATS

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I hope you had a good Valentine's Day anyway, in spite of all of the emotions...

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NATS,

I can just imagine the hard day Friday must have been. I also understand how Valentines day can be hard enough for all of us. Yours just must have been so intense. Today is the third demark day for Kathy. I find myself living that moment and remember going to sleep next to her for the last time. All of those hard memories of the last days hurt. They hurt us all so much. One thing I do that makes it more tolerable, is that I take myself out to dinner on Valentines day and celebrate it with one of our favorite drinks and enjoy the simple fact that I am still in love with an angel. I let the love she gave me get me through. I let the love I have for her still shine on. Love you see is tempered with sorrow and joy. If you didn't have sad, you could never appreciate happy. Happy moments come and they always will. That is what they would want for us. It sounds like you have a grip on this already.

May you find peace till next time.

Stephen

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