djlopan Posted April 8, 2014 Report Share Posted April 8, 2014 I just realized she might read this looking for direction on her own, and although my thread was a quest for direction to help my dearest love grieve, I do not want my pseudo selfish insecurities to weigh on her. That would be wrong, and stupid. Thus, the edit. Thank you for your reply Enna, I have come to see what you have written as true. to those who may happen upon this thread in similar situations, the greatest piece of clarity I have had that helped me was in defeating the self preservation complex. or simply, getting over myself. Now, I feel as much in a place of calm as possible, and know that what she needs is what she shows. That as painful as it is, there is nothing to be done except persevere. The insecurities still exist, and they likely will for some time. But I have found a place of confidence, where I can be her rock, as she wants, when she wants, and however she wants. The deep sadness that I feel for her pain is unbearable, but that is my burden. This burden is also what drives me to see her well, and to do it right. I am trying to embrace reality, and accept that she will grieve as she must, and I will (painfully) stand by, even if it is at a distance both by her will, and by our geography. I may return to this thread, as things develop, as I certainly found great comfort in writing the initial post, and reading your reply. thank you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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