missingjack Posted June 27, 2014 Report Share Posted June 27, 2014 I am beside myself. My precious Jack, a young Blue Heeler, was playing in the yard with his brother, Canon. I went inside for a moment, figuring it would be okay since they typically stay out of the street. I heard a weird, loud, horrifying cry 3 times. When I went outside I saw Jack laying across the road in front of my house(we live in the country). Canon came running and was scared and hid in his crate inside the house. I ran to Jack and noticed there were no wound marks, but his tongue was hanging out and he was not moving or breathing. I called my husband, Chris, and he came home immediately. He works at a ranch just a few houses down. He scooped Jack up and put him in the back of his truck. We drove him across the street and up our driveway. We noticed blood leaking from his side. There was no wound though. We figured that he had major internal bleeding and that he was bleeding out of his skin on his belly. We have wrapped him a blanket and buried him next to some trees and the woods behind our home. We have a little grave stone. Chris went back out a couple hours ago and dug Jack back up to make sure he was really gone. To watch the grief overcome my husband was horrible. I am carrying a HUGE amount of guilt and I am in a place of hating myself right now. If I would have been outside then he would still be here, chewing on his toes at my feet and chasing his brother around. If I had been more responsible then he would be snuggled in his bed that I have spent the last 3 hours weeping in. If I didn't have to carry around all of this guilt and shame then I feel I could grieve so much easier. To grieve and then have these horrible emotions on top of it, is so hard. I feel like I need permission to stop blaming myself. It has just been a few hours, but the anxiety from the guilt and the loss of Jack, that I am physically ill from it. I just need a hand to hold right now.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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