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New Relationship My Boyfriends Father Dying

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I'm 36 years old and I have been dating my boyfriend for only 1 months and a half. I new right away how compatible we were and where the relationship could grow to. I was meeting his son and his mom ..it was all planned

Since we met I knew his father had cancer that had returned and my boyfriend often spoke about it with me .. how he felt ect..he just this week found out that they are not doing chimo and he has only weeks to live..

I know I have only experienced his grief with that news and I also know that there will be the true grief after the loss..

I care tremendously for him and want to be there for him.Its difficult cause I don't know the family .. I'm afraid of what this will do on the progression of our relationship Since it so new... He does talk to me about his feelings and he is happy I am there to listen.. I know that a lot of his time will be spent with his father and family and I will unfortunately be but on the back burner..

I guess I would like some advice on anyone who has been in this situation.

I want to be there but I also no my needs may be put aside.

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There are many, many that have been in this situation in "Loss of Love" section. I currently posted a response to the poster there telling him just what his XGF is feeling, I hope you will read it and glean some understanding of what your BF is and will be going through. It will stress your relationship to the limit but that doesn't mean it will break, only time will tell how he will handle things.

It's important not to put any demands on him. The least little thing, when someone is grieving, can be construed as a demand. Sometimes even saying I love you or I miss you is viewed that way because they think you want something back from them that they're unable to give at this time. It will take a lot of understanding and patience on your part. Grief is a life changing experience.

I'm sorry for your BF and I wish the best for your relationship. Try not to get discouraged when you read this section, remember, it's the ones who are grieving their relationship that mostly come to this site, we don't hear from those who made it through. Take it a day at a time. Feel free to start your own thread there or have the moderator move this there, and post how you're feeling, your concerns, questions, etc. as you're going through this experience.

post #27)

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