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I remember when I first met Daniel, he tracked every possible date. He would say things like: Today is the 6 week anniversary of the first time I held your hand. Today is the 3 week anniversary of the first time we kissed. Today is the 1 year anniversary of our first date.

This is on my mind as today marks three months since I lost Daniel at 3:20 am on January 13th, 2015. I expected to have many special dates to mark my time with Daniel, but not this one.

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Amy,

For quite a while, I marked the weeks since Mark died. It was on a Thursday. Every Thursday at 7:11 am my heart sinks. It was 4 months on April 4. Every time I hear an ambulance (and we live near a hospital, so it is frequently) I think of that morning. I don't remember hearing a siren that morning, but some tell me it is because it was the case of a heart attack. When we followed the ambulance to the hospital, I remember no sirens, but it did stop in the middle of the street. The case was that Mark had gone into cardiac arrest and they had to stop. I wasn't at the hospital very long until they came and told me he was gone. One the entire ride to the hospital (about 3 minutes) I NEVER considered he wouldn't make it. You see ambulance and people working on him, and you think he will make it.

Mark was also very sentimental like Daniel. He liked to come across as a tough cowboy type, but he was a marshmallow inside. He liked to watch chick flicks with me...not the macho, car chase filled ones.

This passed weekend, Mark's nephew was married in the Texas hill country. Mark had wanted to take me there so many times. He loved EVRYTHING about Texas...to me he WAS Texas. His mom told me that she thought about him when she was looking out at the Texas hills. I wasn't even there, and I started crying.

I am glad you made it here to this forum. There are folks in just about every stage of grief. I find it hard sometimes to read a lot of the posts, because it hurts so much yet. I am still at the stage where I am shaking my head and not able to believe it happened. I hope you find some validation here.

Maryann

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(((hugs)))

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I understand. Tomorrow is the two month anniversary of my wife's death. It seems to hit me harder this month. Shalom

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Amy,

I'm so very sorry. I lost my darling wife January 9th of this year. She was a romantic. She did things like that quite often through our years. Remembered the little moments. Not significant to others. But to us, so important.

Hugs to you.

Butch

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:wub: sending hugs to those having a tough time on this journey. Many of us who have been here for awhile really do understand and we want you to know that you do not travel alone.

Anne

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