I miss my Gulu so much it hurts

[MartyT]

Of course it is up to you, my dear, whether you decide to go. Just know that you'll not find a more caring, compassionate and loving individual than the person who facilitates this group. (This is the group I facilitated myself for more than a decade when I was with Hospice of the Valley, and Mara is the person to whom I passed the baton when it came time to pick my successor. She is as close to being an earthly angel as anyone I've ever known.)

[Nikki D]

23 hours ago, stelly4ever said:

I was thinking of getting a Stella clone. I would actually LOVE one. Is there an artist you can recommend? Is yours a pretty good likeness? I still have many vet bills to pay from her, so it will be a while but I'd like to start looking. The vet gave me a good, clear paw print because I told them I was going to get it tatooed. And I am. I also have some of her fur. Can't look at that just yet.

 

I got Kura's clone from Cuddle Clones. www.cuddleclones.com  Two people from our rescue group had theirs made and they love them. I am happy with mine. They are inexpensive and affordable. I paid &249 plus S/H - total was around $260. But as soon as I placed my order, they started special deal ($199)! They seem to run this special deal when they aren't too busy so you may want to keep checking their website or their FB page. I heard it gets very busy before holiday seasons. Mine took less than 2 months but one lady from our group told me it took her over 3 months until she got hers. 

[MyGulu]

Hi Everyone!!

Stelly4ever, hope you are doing better.  I said in an old post that I was ready to see Gulu's pictures & videos but I realized very soon that I could not & still can't. He too feels too real & in most of his pictures, he looks directly at the camera. It seems he looks directly at me & the feeling though very life like, is very unsettling.I miss holding Gulu so much.. Watching Stella's video felt good. Absolutely enjoyed them!! Even though the intensity has decreased, I start crying out of the blue. Today, while at work, I was looking through some text files & I came across one where, I had saved the id/pwd of this account & immediately I started crying. And, for you its not yet two months & this is the time when the grief is still very intense, as Nikki also pointed out.

Even when things seem to feel or get a little better, it suddenly hits that Gulu will never be present beside me ever again. For example, I was chatting with my mother in my bedroom today & I felt that just a couple of months back, he used to sit beside me & now that place is forever going to be empty. Yes, it gets easier to deal with, with time but at the same time its not easy either. I am crying as I am writing this too.

Pugs have separation anxiety more than other dogs I think. Gulu had too much of it, of all our dogs he had it the most. So no wonder Brie has it. Even, our pomeranian has developed it to a certain degree after Gulu. The dream I had, was sort of inconclusive, somehow in my dream also I knew something was not real.

I said earlier that keeping  busy distracts to a certain degree. But at days I still can't move myself to do even the most basic chores.

Nikki, did you visit any more places? Hope you are better too now.

 

 

[Nikki D]

MyGulu, I know how you feel... I have been there, right around the same time. I am still scared to open Kura's videos. The sudden grief will come and go. I believe it's called STUG (Sudden Temporary Upsurges of Grief). Marty posted this for me when I was suffering with one: http://www.griefhealingblog.com/2014/08/in-grief-coping-with-stugs-sudden.html 

One of my friends posted this on social media a few days ago which I liked. I want to share it here, too.  http://www.thatericalper.com/2015/08/16/person-is-asking-for-advice-hn-how-to-deal-with-grief-this-reply-is-incredible/

I just dog-sat another Greyhound over the weekend. He is a big, laid-back guy, just like Kura. He reminded me so much of Kura. They have different fur colors but they are about the same size. I can't believe Kura was that big, now that I am sort of used to Saya's size. I went through some mixed feeling while he was here - It hurt to realize that he is not Kura and I started to miss him terribly, then at the same time, it felt good to be able to see and feel him - it felt like I was looking/touching Kura, and it even made me feel that I want another male Greyhound again. We still have some events coming up and we'll be busy for a while. 

[Marj37]

Thanks so much - I just read the post you linked by a friend.   It was wonderful .

And those surges of grief - they are frightening and normal.  Hard to handle but they do pass .   I sure know about how those feel.

[MyGulu]

Nikki, I read your friend's post. Its very aptly described. The grief does come in waves.

I know the feeling, I saw some videos of other pugs & though there are many similarities with Gulu there are many dissimilarities as well. After all, each one of these kids, has his/her own distinct personalities. So even if there are certain things common pertaining to a specific breed, each one's uniqueness makes him/her that special. I too want another pug someday. Somehow I feel that if I get another dog again, it has to be a pug. So I can feel what you felt when you dog-sat the other Grey Hound. Gulu, Kura, Stella have made such indelible marks on our lives that, they will never go away.

I am missing Gulu very much today.