Indeed it seems as though your concern is your husband's grieving and how to handle it going forward. It sounds very hard on you all and brings back memories of when my husband struggled with his father's relatively young death. His anger was palpable. I know you said your husband is not open to any counseling but please click here. You may consider talking alone to this free counseling service that may help you with ideas how to help your husband and family. I am praying for you; feel free to reach out any time.