Lost my best Friend/Love/Soul mate - Somewhat Complicated
Hello.
3 months ago, I lost my friend of 11 years to breast cancer. It happened suddenly when treatment seemed to be going ok.
- It was a long distance, unusual and complicated friendship. She lived in the USA, me in the UK.
- We would text, phone, skype, email every single day. Every day. Write letters. Send gifts every Christmas. I wear clothes she bought me on most days.
- It wasn't just a friendship. We loved each other. And I do mean loved in the strongest possible terms
My dear Finch,
I’m so sorry to learn of the death of your beloved, and sorry too that you’re feeling so broken and invisible in the wake of this difficult loss.
What you are experiencing is what we’ve come to know as “disenfranchised grief” ~ a term originally coined by Dr. Kenneth Doka. It won’t change a thing, but reading a bit about this form of complicated grief may help you to better understand why you’re feeling as you do. See, for example, Ken’s article, Coping with Hidden Sor
