Vaughn

Dear Vaughn, I am so sorry for your loss. I think the world tends to think that losing an ex-spouse is not as painful as losing a spouse but I have walked with my friend as she grieved the loss of her ex-spouse and that helped me to see how deep that pain is. You shared life, kids, and so much more including a friendship and his asking for you and you being there spoke of the love you had for each other. I am so sorry. These early days are so tough. I never thought they would get better when my husband died 2 years ago but they do get easier. Right now it is a matter of honoring your pain and grief and that of the kids, taking care of yourselves and sharing here and with others who are there for you in this loss. I understand your statement that you are experiencing grief like never before. It DOES get better in time but as I said, it is now time to feel your feelings and be there for the kids also. This group is a good place for you to share and vent. We all respect loss, believe me. No judgments. I wish you peace on this painful path. Mary mfh

Mary, I shared your post with my Mom. She agreed this was absolutely what I need.

Thanks so much.

Kay,

Thank you so much. I really needed this.

My ex Husband passed April 27, 2012. We were divorced 12 years to the date. I need to add we were good friends. He would absolutely do anything for me and three boys we shared. I can remember the day they found him in his house (January 16, 2012)unconscious. He was transported to the Hospital and the next events changed mine and the children life. His leg was amputated from complications of diabetes and a number of health issues from the complications of the diabetes. I miss him. I miss his voice and how he would call. My life consisted of helping my 23 year old son make real grown up decisions. My routine consisted of hospital visits after work. I felt he would have done the same thing for me. The last three weeks of his life he started to ask for me. He could not speak directly, because he had a Trach and was on the ventilator. Our communication was through a word chart. However, I could never make out what he was trying to tell me. He seem so happy to see me. We both had moved on with our lives, but did the right thing by our children. Somebody help me with this. His life was very significant in ours. I am experiencing grief like I never have before.