Selfloathing

Hi All, still hanging in there 👍.just wanted to say thanks for the support. Still battling but at least I know I’m not some kind of pervert or abnormal. Battling to come to terms with the fact that “that part” of our marriage is over. It hurts! I should be grateful she is still alive and kicking but I’m obsessing about this. S’pose having depression doesn’t help much either.

Life loves throwing curveballs doesn’t it. Yesterday was a trigger day for me, got through it very well though, happy about that. I didn't mention before, I have suffered with severe treatment resistant depression most of my life coupled with PTSD from army days. I also suffered a stroke in one eye a few years back, consequently have about 10% vision in that eye. Then, last night, we find out my son's girlfriend, who seems to be very good for him,  has a relapse of cancer, apparently very aggressive and a rare form. She is going to be having a double mastectomy, chemo etc. 
Now my son has to cope with a dying mother and a gf with, in my opinion, very slim prospects. He is also a depression sufferer. 

f****** sitting here bawling my eyes out. 

Fun just never stops 

Hi all and thanks sincerely for the feedback. Haven’t yet got to read the articles mentioned, but have every intention of doing so. 
I have tried to raise the topic a few times but it didn’t go well, so now I think I Will abandon any hope and just accept it, hard as that may be. It will not diminish my desire for her but will at least relieve frustration in hoping I might get lucky. Accept that cuddles and hugs will be all and, To be crude, I guess I will have to be satisfied with mrs Palmer 

Hi all, brand new here.

i have been searching the web in vain for some information on this to no avail.

i am a 61 year old male, my wife of 62 is suffering from a rare, progressive, terminal disease, diagnosed about 6 years ago. 

My wife is literally skin and bones, vein definition and body fat a bodybuilder would give pretty much anything for. She has lost about 1/3 of her body weight, from about 150 lbs to below 100, sex has been non existent with us the last 5 years, she is totally against it (for obvious reasons). Now here’s the part no one talks about. I still desire her desperately even though we last had any form of sexual contact about 5 years ago, any form of sexual contact would be awesome. Am I alone in this? Am I abnormal? I’m becoming obsessed with this.

i hope I don’t get judged too harshly