jen2010

Thanks so much for the kind words and advise , l am still absolutely beyond devestated but l am starting to tell myself that l did the right thing by my bubby , l have also opened up to my mum and sister who live in a differnt state to me at how devestating this has been to me and l now have something to look forward to to save a bit of money to visit them as l havent seen them in 4 years (sometimes you just need your family to hug you).l never wanted my family to know how devesating this is to me as l just didnt want to hurt them. Bubby was far more than a pet to me. She was my family my soul mate . Simply ingrained in my every day live and my heart , and so much a part of my daily life and routine, that the house and my heart seem intensely empty without her. Bubby was amazing. She loved me unconditionally. She made me incredibly happy. I will miss her so much. I suppose when you love something so much, when that something is gone, it just hurts all the more. She is the best thing to ever happen to me. I am crushed with grief RIP my sweet little girl words can not express the love l have for you and the emptiness in my heart now you’re gone.You will always be remebered. Thank you all so much for your advise and support

l had to put my sweet bubby (dog) to sleep l have had her 18 years , Even though its only a few days l am finding it harder and harder to cope l feel guilt even though she was very very ill , l keep questioning maybe l should have given more time to see if the vet hospital could help her she was ill 13 days with one day she seemed to pick up until she became worse vomitting blood brown bile and unable to walk.When they said she had a less then 10% chance of getting better l took the option to put her to sleep. l know in my head l did the right thing l took her to the vet 3 times in that 13 days with new treatment each time as she had a disease in her immune system that was eating her blood cells . But my heart is so full of guilt and sadness l am not coping well l have locked myself in my bedroom the last few days as going into the main rooms of the house the open lounge kitchen dining l feel such incredible emptiness , as l dont feel my dogs presence or smell on her blanket this makes me more upset. My dad commited suicide 7 years ago and this is such a horrible thing to say but l am hurting more over my dogs death then my own dads, l know l have to stop thinking this way but l dont know what to do l feel so alone and like l am going crazy .