Hi, first off I ask for all who respond to forgive my ignorance in this matter. I don't know a whole lot and really need some advice. My girlfriend's mom past away 11/29/2010 from colon cancer and things havnt been the same between us. Before her mother's passing we were talking of getting married and having kids. Infact we have always taked about such things ever since we began dating in high school. We truly loved each other. But since her passing things have been on a downward spiral. To make matters worse her little brother is only 12 and she is now his legal guardian. In the beginning I was there as often as I could be, willing to listen and not say a word as I really didn't know what to say. I admit when I did speak I said the wrong things like she is in a better place and is no longer suffering. Dumb thing to say now I see. She used to talk to me about things, how she was feeling and what her days were like. How hard things were. But slowly she stopped talking to me. Stopped telling me that she loved me. When things. Started to feel different, I asked her if she wanted me to take a step back and give her some space, she told me no. She didn't want me to go anywhere. But things continued to get worse. Again I asked her if she wanted me to take a step back, she told me no. But she became more and more distant. And now we are at a point where days go by and she won't respond to my calls or texts. At the moment she doesn't have a job so I know she is very frustrated with having to take care of her little brother. She is living with her stepdad, but he isn't acting right either. We kind of have been talking more regularly but when we do I feel like a stranger. Like she won't let me in anymore. While we have a date for valentines day it feels like she is slowly slipping away from me.
We talked last week and she told me I should move. She said that while she loves me dearly and is still deeply inlove with me she can't promise that we will be together. She doesn't want to talk about the future at all. She says she doesn't feel like the same person. I told her that while I respect that she needs her space, that I wasn't going anywhere. I will always be right here for for anything she needs. She said thanks and
She doent know it yet, but I am paying $700 for to get her bartenders liscence. Its what she wants to do and it provides her a way to take care of her and her little brother. I'm just mad I didn't think of it before. I can't wait to give it to her, but I feel that in the time it will take everything to be finalized she may see us as just friends.
Please give me some advice, I love this woman with all my heart and don't know want to love or be with anyone elseM when I look at her, I still see the woman I love and want to marry and have a family with but I just don't know if that will ever come true now
What should I do?
