Amz

Hello all,

Not to sure if this is normal or not, but I thought I would share with you.

Every time I go to visit Mum at the cemetery, I go to her grave, I stand there, but I feel nothing. I want to feel something because that's my Mum there, and I don't feel sadness or anything.

I don't know why I am like that. Maybe there's an explanation for it?

Thank you for reading, responses will be much appreciated!

Amy

Hello everybody,

I was just thinking to myself that time goes ever so quickly!

This November it will be 4 years since my Mum died of cancer, I just can't quite believe that its been that long already!

This may sound crazy, but to me it feels as if it never happened unless my Nan or someone brings it up.

Anyway, I hope you guys are well

This may be a stupid question but how do you know if you've dealt with grief?

Thank you for your replies, they have helped!

If you don't open yourself up to grief, will it eventually catch up with you and come down on you like a ton of bricks?

Its been over 3 years now and I don't think I've ever really felt extremely over-whelmed and upset. I don't think I've even properly accepted it yet. I am now nearly 19, and was 15 when my Mum died.

Thank you Pam!

And yes, I suppose with time - probably lots of time - thing will gradually get better.

Its nearly Christmas, I hope you have a good one :-)

Amy

Thanks Ron for the reply.

I really like to hear the opinions of different people as it makes me think and get a better idea at what different feelings and emotions can mean.

I hope you had a nice Thanksgiving, as I live in England, we don't celebrate it here.

Amy

I had no idea about his brother!

I have posted a comment on the page with the song, although I'm not sure if the comment went through or not!

Amy

The other day I came across a song by an American band called Daughtry - if any of you are familiar with them.

I came across their new album, and found a song on there called Gone Too Soon, and so I listened at I found the lyrics to be quite moving, and they may be with you all who read this. So below are the lyrics and there is a link to the song if you want to listen to it as well.

"Gone Too Soon"

Today could have been the day,

That you blow out your candles,

Make a wish as you close your eyes.

Today could have been the day,

Everybody was laughing,

Instead I just sit here and cry,

Who would you be?

What would you look like,

When you looked at me for the very first time?

Today could have been the next day of the rest of your life.

Not a day goes by,

That I don't think of you,

I'm always asking why this crazy world had to lose,

Such a ray of light we never knew,

Gone too soon, yeah.

Would you have been president?

Or a painter, an author, or sing like your mother,

One thing is evident,

Would've given all I had,

Would've loved you like no other.

Who would you be?

What would you look like,

Would you have my smile and her eyes,

Today could have been the next day of the rest of your life.

Not a day goes by,

That I don't think of you,

I'm always asking why this crazy world had to lose,

Such a ray of light we never knew,

Gone too soon, yeah.

Not a day goes by,

Oh

I'm always asking why.

Not a day goes by,

That I don't think of you,

I'm always asking why this crazy world had to lose,

Such a beautiful light we never knew,

Gone too soon, yeah.

Not a day goes by,

That I don't think of you.

link to the song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A2e2S9kRXNw

I know it says my thoughts, but please feel free to reply if you wish!

Well I have been thinking about things today because it's been 3 years since my Mum passed, and well I have some things on my mind.

Its a bit weird but I don't feel sad today, but I am supposed to right?

Can something be so painful that you don't want to face the emotions and feelings of that pain?

Amy

Hi

I lost my Mother nearly 3 years ago. She had brain cancer.

I'm so sorry for your loss. All the people here are here to listen and try to help, just like me.

Take care

Amy

This forum is a great place to share things. Just think that something you write could have an impact on people which is good. Sometime all they want is to read something and feel comforted by it!

I would reply to things, but I can never think of anything to say.

I come on here every night on my mobile phone and read things, its now my bedtime routine!!!

As Marty says, I think you'll enjoy it too :-)

Amy

Well I haven't posted in a while and so I thought I would share some things with you, and then maybe you can help me understand a bit better. I lost my Mother in November 2008 to cancer. Ever since then I haven't really cried about it, I don't know if it was to do with her having the illness for about 3 years. I was 15 at the time. Even at the funeral I didn't cry...I don't like talking about it even today. The thing is I don't understand why I don't when that's what other people do. I do want to talk about it, but I just can't, its like there is something blocking me from my feelings about it maybe? Another thing is that I kind of feel like I don't miss her, but I know I do, and I don't think that's right.

I hope you can maybe help a bit! It would be appreciated!!

So me feeling like I don't miss her is normal, and feeling as if nothing ever happened? And me never talking about it!? That's all normal?

I don't think it is..its been nearly 3 years since she passed.

Thank you for your kind words

Amy

Thank you!

Its weird, I can't bring myself to like "talk" to her, it doesn't feel normal, and neither does going to the cemetery. Is that weird for me to feel like that?

Amy

Well its nearly my Mums birthday.

I'm going up the cemetery the day after, but I want to write something to maybe say or just lay down there, the only problem is, is that I don't know what to write, and I was hoping maybe one of you could help me?

It would be greatly apprectaited (:

Amy