cathsnider

Hi Whiteswan - I saw your posting and had to respond to it. I too, lost my wondeful mom (age 64!) on May 17, 2006. She died a very painful death from stomach cancer and I spent the last two weeks of her life with her in the hospital. We were very, very close and I feel so absolutely alone and depressed. My husband and I do not have ANY family where we live, and now ever since my mom died, like you said, no one calls or emails. It seems as though ever since the funeral, no one has bothered to check in and see how I'm doing. Even my brother and sister in-law haven't called me at all!!! It's amazing and heartbreaking. At any rate, I am very sorry for your loss and feel your pain. The main reason I wanted to respond to you was because of your description of what is happening to you physically - I am/was experiencing the EXACT SAME THING! About 3 weeks after her death, I was paying for an item at the store and had that lightheaded, blackness from my peripheral vision kind of thing. I had to grab the wall. Worst of all it made me so scared to walk out to my car and drive home!! I've gotten it a couple times since then so I went to the doctor. I had a lot of blood work done and nothing came back so she put me on Lexapro and it is really helping. I am still kinda woozy at times though, but it has helped with the crying and the dizzy spells and it has only been 2 weeeks of taking it. It is supposed to get even better....so maybe you could try that, or something like it. I look for signs from my mom all the time and don't feel or see anything === that would be very helpful to feel that peace, but it isn't coming to me yet. This is going to be such a painful, long process of healing. It is hard to imagine ever feeling normal again. I wish you well on your journey of recovery.