I have been doing fine up until today... I lost my mom in May of last year and watched my father die in August.. he had cancer and gave up after my mom died. Everyone seemed to know that was going to happen but me. I guess I knew somewhere in my heart but did not want to believe it. Since my parents death struggles and major loss have continued. My boyfriend told me that he started to pull away from me when my dad was dying. He did not understand why I would drop everything to take care of him,(I am an only child) after all I had my own family to take care of. I found out the person I bought my business from was a conartist I had to choose to save the business or drop everything at the business to take care of my dad.. thus leading to the closure of the business and a failed relationship. my boyfriend told me that he could not deal with me being sad all the time.. I rarely ever talked to him about either death and dealt with it on my own time.. per his request.. but today was so hard for me... I am living in a new place, started a new job that I suck at and am just so lonely. These are the times that I would reach out to my parents for support.. but neither are here for me to talk to.. I feel really alone and hopped on the internet looking for some kind of support group or something to be able to openly talk about these major losses. I am not looking to complain or say whoe is me... I am just going through so much loss and need to talk. I know that God is with me in this.. I know there is a rainbow after every storm. However I am just in so much pain from the loss of everything. I could not stop crying today.. no matter what I did the tears would not stop... it was so embarassing. All I could do was wipe the tears away and try to seem "normal".
