Jolyne

Thank you, I'm sure the images will diminish in time, I just still can't believe she's gone and I miss her so much:( I've been crying less and it's easier to talk about her now, my other dog buddy is doing better and I know I have to be strong for him as well as my children. My son is only 4 and he doesn't really understand but I haven't sugar coated it for him. He knows she's not coming home now. I just really loved that dog and the bond we had was so strong, I could literally read her mind all the time lol . She was such a character, too smart for her own good I guess. I hope she is in heaven having a great time:) there's is no concept of time there so she won't even know how long it is from the time I see her again. I read the book proof of heaven and it was really great. It helped a lot even tho I have faith, it's hard to not have doubts during a time like this. Thanks so much.

I keep replaying the whole scenario in my head, her and buddy running together then her getting hit and lying on the road:( I don't understand why I keep replaying this, it's like I keep wishing it never happened and we were back at 2 weeks ago when I could snuggle her and love her again:( I guess that may be the bargaining stage in the grieving process... I keep telling myself that I can't change anything but I can't help but feel so sad! I know it will get easier in time tho.. Thanks for your insight:)

I keep thinking about her and I miss her so much... I cry every morning cuz she's not here and I have to picture her death to believe it everyday:( this is so hard and I am starting to feel better and starting to accept that she's gone but I guess it comes in waves and that's the hardest.. I've been reading some good books about death and dying and it has been helping.

I'm so sorry for your loss, I lost a brother black lab (my dads dog) a couple years ago and it still hurts as well. I just lost my beautiful boxer/pit mix and it's so heart wrenching. I've never used forums like this before either but I was desperate for help because I felt so sad that I couldn't handle it. I hope that time has helped you and I hope it helps me as well. Christmas is such a rough time too but you should definitely get another dog. Anyone with a heart big enough to love so much is deserving of always having animals. They need us as much as we need them and there are so many out there that need human love. I wish you the best and happy holidays!

Thank you so much guys, he will get better in as will I.. I never knew this could hurt so bad, I always imagined what life would be like without her because she was always a runner but when it actually happens it hits really hard.. It's almost surreal like it can't be! I've never suffered a loss like this and it's tough but I guess it won't be the first time in my life and I'll know what to expect next time. I'm glad I joined those in because although it made me cry more, it helped me realize that I'm not alone and I feel better about that. It helps to talk about it. People say I should keep my mind on other things but it's almost impossible..

Buddy is taking it really hard.. He is not himself and I'm worried about him. We are all trying to heal I'm glad to share some pictures!

Here are a couple pictures and a video of her with the others, she really was such an amazing dog and her and buddy were so close.. He was there when she got hit and I knew something was wrong when he came home alone because they always stay together.. I miss her terribly and I'm having a hard time:( thanks everyone for your kind words. I'm having her cremated as well and going to include my letter and her ball. My husband also wrote a song for her. She touched a lot of hearts so many tears have been shed. I just hope I can eventually accept her death and not feel so sad, I have a 4 year old and a 3 month old baby as well who need me to be me again so this is really tough:(

IMG_3129.mov

My letter to my dog... I miss her so much and it's so hard, I feel like I'm never going to get over here:( here is my letter; My honey, I love you more than words could ever describe. You were a one of a kind dog and so awesome. You were always there when I needed you and you cuddled with me all the time. I always wanted a cuddly affectionate dog and you took the cake on that one. Sometimes it was a little too much! Waking up with your face in mine but I would give anything to cuddle with you one more time.. I wish I would have chased you with your ball more, you would just never give me that damn ball. You even put it in your water or food dish while you ate and drank so nobody could get it. I know your best friend buddy is having a hard time and if he could talk he would tell you that he misses you so much. I'm doing my best to help him through this and hopefully he will be better soon. I wish I could have been there to hold you after that vehicle hit you. I'm sorry I couldn't be there for you. I'm mad at you too tho for taking off again.. It was the worst day for it with the rain and it was dark, that car didn't see you my baby girl and im so sorry that you had to die that way:( I wish I could turn back time but I have to wait to see you once I go to the other side too. I have your brothers and your new sister here to look after still and I need to accept that your gone. I made you a memorial with a bunch of your best pictures up on the wall so I can see you everyday and we are going to throw your ashes in the lake next summer with your tennis ball so you can always be doing what you love. Your my angel watching over me now and I hope you come and visit me in my dreams or in spirit. Please dont be afraid to come see me my girl because I will always welcome you with open arms. Even tho your a spirit now, I hope your running a muck up in heaven and doing what you love to do. You were the best dog anyone could ask for and I'm going to miss you forever baby girl. I love you and I'll see you again one day! Xoxoxoxoxo