Rivka

Mary T I just saw the message in a filtered request section so I sent back accept I think from tcf substance abuse page   How do I know what's going on with it ? 

Mary T  I have requested to join that fcbk page and never heard back   Twice  can u help ? 

Thank you  I watched the video ! 

Thank u Mary T  I just started going to compassionate friends and I go to Alanon meetings weekly   I wish there were more local meetings for comp friends     It is helping me to share and i very much appreciate your reply !!!  

Thank you so much for your reply Kay c   We are buried under 2 feet of snow now .... I have done lots of counseling already ...I just have my days of feeling so sad !

I lost my son 7 years ago after a struggle with addiction..before he died he sent me a text telling me how much he loved me and what a good mom i was ...this was like a gift to me because he died a month later ....  I was busy after his death taking care of all my other children and making sure they were all ok  .i have 7 others ....so now everyone seems to b ok and I am left still feeling so sad ....I have a rich full life but I am scared that this sadness won't go away .  I'm learning not to run from the feelings and to just feel them but that's hard for me to do ...  With all the other issues that come from regular living this feels like too much to handle .. I have had many dreams about him  and I know his soul is here it's just so sad some days that I feel like I want to die along with him ..I hope this struggle will ease and I won't have to live with this always ...  

On June 29, 2015 at 11:56 AM, lightdancer said:

As I was driving to my riding lesson I was thinking about healing and felt something was coming to me but I couldn't explain it. Then, a dialogue began and it was as if I was watching two actors on the stage. It was between a character named Grief and one named Life.

 

The experience began with Grief dominating, and Life being dormant. As time went on Life opened up a little crack, but Grief said, "NO, there is no place for you. This is too tragic."

 

Life said in a quiet voice, "I think I feel myself breathing again."

 

Grief responded, "How could you, you've lost everything."

 

As time went on and healers appeared the dialogue got stronger. Lifesaid,

"I want to live and breathe."

 

Life became passionate, I want you to stop hurting"

 

Grief responded,"I will never stop hurting, the loss is too profound, you need to let me bleed."

 

And Life said,

"You need to let me live."

 

And so the conversation continued. Life believing that living would never be possible with Grief around and Grief afraid that Life would push away the need to honor the profound loss. Life wanted to breathe and dance, Grief wanted to collapse and cry.

 

Soon Life and Grief faced each other, they dropped the tug-o-war rope. Life said, "it is ok for you to cry and hurt for the rest of your life."

Grief said, "it is ok for you to live."

And so they moved closer to each other. Life knew it did not have to wait for Grief to go away in order to live. Grief knew that it was ok to hurt while Life was opening up. Grief and Life embraced and locked hands and existed side by side.

 

I can't sit and wait for grief to end in order to start living. Grief does not have to go away in the presence of abundant life and growth. When the two can exist side by side, and it is not one or the other, well, that is healing.

 

I love this  thank you so much !! I will read it over and over again   My son died 6 years ago and I was busy taking care of all my other kids ..  I am going on but am overcome with grief and this post is awesome   Thank You