Wade

Butch, I am new to this site, just joined yesterday. Your words touched me so much because I lost my beautiful bride of 21+ years just a few weeks ago, on December 27th. She too was my everything, still is, and losing her has thrust me into being the sole parent of my 20 year old daughter and 16 year old son. She was diagnosed with AML in March and went through so many procedures in nine months it hurts my heart to even think about it. I am just now starting to have the pain of being without her creep into my life, so I can't even imagine being a year from now or more and hurting even worse. I am so sorry for your loss and pain. Hearing how the two of you were so wrapped around each other reminds me so much of my Jackie and me. The only thing helping me keep my sanity right now is knowing that she would not want me to endure the pain of her loss, which I know is not an easy thing to dismiss, nor should you, but would be yelling at me to get my s*** together, and focus on the kids and keeping my life together because she's not here to make sure everything gets handled properly. I can only hope for you that your grief will subside some so that somehow you can still find joy even though she's not physically here to share it with you. I know that's what Jackie would wish for me, and as special as your loved one appears to have been to you I would think she would want that too. Again, I'm so sorry that it hurts so much.