I am so sorry for your loss, reading your story I could feel the love and the loss, it has been 8 years for me soon and I can still remember the day like yesterday me and my daughter getting a call to come home from work getting home and the paramedics saying sorry mam he didn't make it, this place is full a truly caring people who know what you are going through and feel for you, I used to be on here all the time now usually one a year or so especially when closer to anniversary of death day always have to make a new account, try to take it one day one breath at a time and please know you are not alone hugs!!!