I lost my father in January of 2002. I it has been over a year and half and I have to say I am still pretty pissed off at the world. I am 29 years old and he died at the age of 54. I always knew I would be young when my father passed because he didn't take the best care of himself, but it came as such a shock as I am sure every death does. I keep feeling like one magical day it won't be so hard, I won't be so angry and I won't compare every one to my father. I am hoping so one can give me some advice. My parents divorced when I was 14 and it was rocky at first. My father was not a very good husband to my mother and I would say not the greatest father at that point in our relationship. I was so angry with him when they divorced, but my mother would not let me break ties with him because he was the only father I would ever have. Time went by and we mended our relationship and he became my best friend. I understand him so well now that I am older. I am happily married and have close ties with all of my family, but I compare everyone to my father now. I am angry with my mother because she is not HIM. I snap at strangers mainly in stores when I feel like they are not providing proper customer service, and I think it all boils down to him being gone. Some days I feel so empty without him and I don't want punish others because I feel this loss. I just wish there was something I could do to let go of the anger.
