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I Want My Mom!

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My mom died on 4/29 and I lost the best mother a daughter could ever hope for. She wanted just one more Christmas with our family but at least she made it to Easter - and had a good day too. Her last days were awful and I can't get all the bad memories out of my head. My anger and hurt feel too huge to handle. My dad is so pitiful. My mom hasn't even been cremated yet and I'll have to leave just days after she is finally laid to rest. I've been 'home' caring for her and helping my dad for a month and I don't know what will happen when i leave. I don't know how I will make it through today as there are so many people to help, we are like a broken bunch of zombies.

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I can imagine how you feel. My mother died on April 6 this year. She had breastcancer, but wasn't doing too bad so her death was still very unexpected. My parents live in the Netherlands (I'm Dutch) but I live in Utah with my Texan husband and our children. When my father called me to tell me to prepare for the worst and please come 'home' I managed to get tickets and arrived on Tuesday...Wednesdaymorning my mother died. I managed to change my tickets around so I could stay for the funeral, but had to leave shortly after that. It was so hard to leave my father there, all alone in their house.

Now I'm here in Utah and it's Mother's Day and I can't even put flowers on my mothers grave... :( (they should have a smiley that is crying its eyes out)

Do you live far away from your father? Are there any people around him that can help him?

I wish you strength to make it through these hard days and hopefully you can make yourself concentrate on the good memories you have.

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Thank you so much for your kind reply - I can't tell you how much it means to me. It was a very tough day but I was able to spend it with my dad and even took him out to breakfast (in retrospect, probably not the brightest idea as everyone kept saying 'happy mother's day')! You reminded me how important it is to focus and cherish the present moment and to count the blessings we do have. I'm sorry you couldn't visit your mother's grave and I ached to read about having to leave your father. Maybe you could place some flowers in a place that reminds you of your mother or that your mother would like. I know Utah is far away, but it may make you feel a little closer to her. I hope also some of your suggestions to me regarding my dad also apply to you - (friends close by..) Always remember, a phone call (skype) even every day is often possible and can make all the difference to someone feeling lonely.

Blessings, strength and peace is what I wish for all of us dealing with this type of loss!

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