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foodcooppres

Contributor
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About foodcooppres

  • Rank
    New Visitor

Profile Information

  • Your gender
    Female
  • Location (city, state)
    Spring Arbor, MI

Previous Fields

  • Your relationship to the individual who died
    mother, also wife
  • Date of Death
    March 31, 2009 for daughter, December 22, 2013 for husband
  • Name/Location of Hospice if they were involved:
    N/A for daughter, Great Lakes Hospice, Jackson, MI for husband

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  1. foodcooppres

    One step forward

    I'm so sorry for this new loss, so soon. I am glad you are going to Griefshare--that was an excellent choice. I found Griefshare very helpful when my daughter died 9 years ago, and again when my husband died. In our journey of mourning, it's two steps forward, one step back--but still moving ahead. I am proud of all the steps you have taken to move on with life. Don't let this new grief throw you. I am confident you will continue to face it with courage. You must have many wonderful memories of your husband's encouragement--I can picture him watching from Heaven with his usual smile. And may the support you receive here also encourage you.
  2. foodcooppres

    He"s sick....but Im falling apart

    I'm so sorry both of you are going through this. I cared for my husband several years before melanoma took his life. He also suffered from some other issues, and during those years our oldest daughter died too, of breast cancer. So I have an idea of what you are feeling. We had a great deal of support, however, from both my church and his church, and pastors who cared and came to pray with us. That was so encouraging! Somehow, with God's help, I have survived and continue to find meaning in my life. Here are some resources that may help and support you as you take this journey: https://list.ly/list/1CNK-resources-for-families-facing-terminal-illnesses. I pray for comfort and strength for you both through your love for each other and God's love for you both.
  3. foodcooppres

    Sad again

    I applaud your courage in sharing your feelings here. You wrote well--we can feel what you are going through in detail. I hope that expressing your feelings provided some release for you. I'm so sorry you had to go through this twice--and two such different experiences, with two different individuals and different situations. Your grief is different too. How wonderful that you have family near, and those sweet grandchildren. Cling to them. My family has been an anchor for me too. I also have found much support at my church and in a support group (find one near you at griefshare.org). I pray that in time this numbness will lift and you will be able to draw strength and comfort from friends as well as family. We will always miss our husbands, but there still can be moments of joy. God bless you on this journey.
  4. I am so sad for you. All the plans you had together--gone in a moment. Such a shock! I appreciate your feelings. I lost my 31-year-old daughter to cancer in 2009 and my husband, after various illnesses over a dozen years, in December 2013. It's hard to wrap your mind around this new stage of life. Some things have helped me. One is my other children, especially my other daughter, who have been very supportive. I'm glad you can be near your children. Do you have grandchildren? If not, I hope there will be some one day. Sweet little ones are such a comfort. Their grandfather will live on in them. Another help was a griefshare support group at my church. The 13-week program was full of insight and useful suggestions. These groups meet all over the country and you may be able to find one near you at griefshare.org. Most recently, a weekly Bible study was about Heaven. It lifted my spirits to think about reunions there, and how beautiful it will be, there with Jesus. I am also working on a project, a book about my life. So I am going through old records, journals, papers, and relishing some good memories. It helps to see reminders that my daughter had a happy childhood, or that my husband and I shared so many precious times. I am trying to focus on the good memories, and be grateful for them. It helps get me through those dark moments. I pray that even at this difficult holiday season, you will find some peace as you begin to adjust to this different life.
  5. foodcooppres

    Not looking forward to the upcoming months...

    Hello, Mike's Girl. I am so encouraged by your positive outlook. You are showing courage, strength, and common sense. I am sure that you are going to weather the holidays with flying colors, and I'm so glad you can spend time with your stepdaughter. Family is so important--they understand your loss because they share it. You might find some tips in this article, http://bit.ly/2lQmLXU. Also, I've been attending the Griefshare group at my church. You might find a location near you at griefshare.com. It's a support group with helpful videos--shared experiences and advice. I'm finding it encouraging. One thing that might take you a step forward in this process, if you are ready, is to find a way to help other people, not necessarily with grieving, but a way to give of yourself to someone who needs you. I've helped with the food pantry at my church, for example, or taken meals to someone who just had a baby. Somehow helping others helps me even more. If you have any extra time after work or on weekends, plenty of places need volunteers. I pray that you will find these holidays a time of joy and peace as well as memories, and may the happy memories predominate. God bless you.
  6. foodcooppres

    Surviving Loss of a Loved One

    Dear TerraN, It sounds like you are coping as well as it's possible to do in the midst of grief. I am glad to hear from you and still praying for you. God bless you.
  7. foodcooppres

    Surviving Loss of a Loved One

    Thanks, kayc. My greatest comfort is knowing I will see my loved ones again in Heaven, and that they are in the best place. All of them knew the Lord.
  8. foodcooppres

    Surviving Loss of a Loved One

    Dear Terra, I am sad with you as you go through these struggles. I wish I could give you a big hug. I'm glad this site has encouraged you, and I also hope you can find the support you need near at hand. In the past 8 years I have lost my oldest daughter, my sister-in-law, my husband, and my mother, and in all this, I found support from friends at church and from a group called griefshare (griefshare.com). You may be able to find a group near you, and you can also sign up for daily encouraging messages from griefshare. I don't know what your physical limitations are exactly, but there may be some alternative health approaches that would help. One site I often consult is mercola.com. You can put a topic in the search bar and often find many helpful articles. It's free. It seems so dark when we are in the middle of such a huge loss, but there is sunshine on the other side of the clouds. You will get through this, and be stronger because of it. God is there for you, and He will hold your hand all the way, as He did for me. Isaiah 43:1-3, Hebrews 4:14-16. I am praying for you.
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