Bdzack, I am also new to posting here. I lost my husband almost 2 years ago, and still have a lot of the same feelings as you. I too just can't seem to focus on the things that need to be done. I had a list of things to be done this weekend, and finally did a few of them today. I used to love to shop, with or without my husband (he actually liked to shop too). I will be in my house and think of things I want to buy, but when I go to the store or the mall, I just don't want to be there, and usually end up leaving without buying what I need. Is that crazy or what? Lately, I have been shopping on-line more just because I don't want to go into the stores. I have only had two dreams of my husband in 2 years. They were very vivid and it just seemed like I could touch him. When I woke, I actually had chills because it seemed so real. However, there have only been 2; I don't understand how I can have dreams of people that I haven't seen in years, or people that are very insignificant to me, but I don't dream of my husband that I think about all the time and miss so much. I too had trouble sleeping after my husband died. I did sleep in our bed from the very first night and never even thought about sleeping anywhere else. I like being in the bed where we slept. But at first I would go to sleep, then wake up in an hour or two and stay awake for several hours. Then I started not being able to go to sleep at all. After a couple of months I talked to my doctor and started taking a mild dose of a sleeping pill (I actually cut the pill into 4th's). But at least I can sleep now, and that is important; especially when you have to work the next day. I have tried going to sleep without the pill and I can't do it. Like you, we were at the age that we were ready to enjoy life...had built a new home that we planned to retire in, had one grandchild, and we had so many plans to travel, etc. Now there is another grandchild on the way, and he will not be here to see it. Life just doesn't seem fair, when I see all my friends and neighbors enjoying lives like we had planned. I am so sorry you had to join this group. Hope that your week goes well. Brenda