Chinook

May 27, 2001

How time flies. I am thinking about you Nana Rose. Today is my mom's birthday and as I call her to wish her a Happy Birthday, I can't help but think of Nana dying in her sleep on the day of my Mom's birthday. Every year my mom struggles with her birthday, a time to celebrate her birth and a time to mourn her own mother's death. My mom is just a strong person. This post is for you Nana. We miss you and love you.

Rest in Peace

Rose Birdsall

2001

Thank you for your kind words. I am sorry for the loss of your fuzzy. I am sorry for the late reply. I got laid of from my job of 14 years and I can not find work. I still think of Nikomi all the time, this 24th will be 3 months since he went to the Rainbow Bridge. He will keep your fuzzy happy and be good company for him as they both look after us from above.

God Bless

Tim

Today is not a good day. No tears but just an empty feeling. It is one of those days when you feel bad all over, you gain a few pounds, you look like crap even after you have shaven and the pains and aches that comes with old age. Feeling so bad, I feel a looming gloom dark cloud on the horizon. It is in the air, the news, the talk radio, work, you do not know who to believe, certainly not the people in power. Feel like a I am a chess piece and am not the players. We are being played, govern, guided to a country that America has never known. We voted for "change" and it is coming, it is here and I feel more of my rights, our liberty, our freedoms are slowly slipping away. I should care, I should fight but I am tired, Feeling too much self pity for myself which is something I do not like. I know everyone does not want to hear about Nikomi anymore. Get over it. Shut up, you are not the only one with loss in your life. So, I do not say anything and I do not reply when someone asks, what is the matter. Your eyes, the spark, the fun, the excitement, where is it? I put on my fake smile and tell the person what they want to hear. The internet is my release of these negative feelings, my pain. For those of you that read these posts, thanks for listening.

God Bless

Tim

Happy Easter my beloved Nikomi. I made a Easter Basket just for you........

Hellow my far away friends today is my birthday and I miss sooo much the first kiss in the morning with his arms full of roses.My grand son who is named after Yiany wanted to blow the candles for me so I had morning wishes from my litle Yiany.Hope you are all doing better and Im sorry for the new members.LOve from far away .TENY

Happy Birthday Friend

God Bless

Farmum, I am so sorry for your loss. These are the times when you have to go to your higher power to deal with your loss. I am sooo sorry. You are in our thoughts and prayers.

Tim

So...I was wondering...anybody else having any experiences with music and how it is affecting/helping you in your grief? I was wondering if anyone had any more songs they could share...

"Let Go, Let God" by Olivia Newton-John on her Grace and Gratitude Album... It helps me ..........

YOU TUBE LINK TO SONG

When you can't find your direction

And your heart won't guide you home

Let Go

Let God

When your dreams are broken in the dust

And you've lost the will to trust

Let Go

Let God

Let the signs remind you

We are passengers

Let the signs remind you

To surrender

To surrender

Let Go and Let God

When faith's a dying fire

And there's no spark to feed the flame

Let Go and Let God

When your courage fails you

And the well of hope runs dry

Let Go and Let God

Let the signs remind you

We are passengers

Let the signs remind you

To surrender

To surrender

Let Go and Let God

Let the signs remind you

We are passengers

Let the signs remind you

To surrender

To surrender

Let Go and Let God

Let Go and Let God

Let Go

And let God.

This line says it all: People need to be sensitive to each other's losses and feeling and not try to compare in thier effort to relate. People always try to compare your loss to something of theirs. Sometimes people just need to listen which they don't. My Mom is saying there is something wrong with me because I am still mourning and crying here and there over my pet ferret, Nikomi. As one counselor told me once, we are not Toyota's coming off a assembly line, everyone is different and we all grieve in own way. Grieving has no time line.

Hello Erik

I am so sorry for your loss. Jake was very fortunate to have such a good "dad". I am 41 years old have been crying also for the loss of my pet ferret Nikomi. Despite what men are taught growing up, showing emotions is a good thing in my book instead of keeping that sorrow in yourself. Pets are like our kids, they know we will take care of them, entertain them, feed them, and make that ultimate hard decision for them because they cannot. I wish I had more words of comfort but can only saw this forum is a blessing and it has helped me so I recommend using this site as a tool of support.

God Bless,

Tim Smith

Maylissa

Thank you so much for your comments. As I read your post, you made me feel so much better about myself. I am so sorry about your loss as well. I am going to check out those resources you mentioned. Thank you so much for listening.

God Bless You

Tim Smith

It has been 3 weeks and 2 days since I lost my pet ferret Nikomi. Everyone thinks I am crazy and perhaps I am. I am so focus on keeping his memory alive. To show what I have done:

I have created a web site: http://www.myspace.com/nikomi_the_ferret

This is mainly a virtual tribute page/ prayer book for me. People tell me you do not know what real grief is, I lost my husband, mother etc and you lost a ferret, get over it.

If I could get over it I would but I feel so empty. Everytime I look at his face or hear a sad song a tear trickles down my face and sometimes when I am alone in the house, I crawl in a fetus position and cry.

In addition, I find myself not throwing away any of his toys or washing a t shirt he slept in. I wrote to the city of geographical maps and submitted suggestions to name landmarks, street names, etc after Nikomi. I am just going crazy. When people die, they are always remember in conversation, holidays, etc but who will remember my Nikomi? Noone just me and that bugs me. I am just feeling sorry for myself today. The pain and loss hurts so much I want it to end but I know it is my responsbity to endure this..... Excuse my spelling by the way... I am not going back and spell checking..... This just sucks. I often wonder when I die if Nikomi would be there in heaven waiting for me or if all this religious teachings is one big bad joke. I do not know... Thanks for allowing me to vent here.

Tim