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Maryo

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Posts posted by Maryo

  1. Hi Marsha,

    I am also at the 18th month on the 21st. I thought life would get so much better and easier and some days I do feel the load is alot lighter but than I go back to that empty feeling.I don't have any quick fix for us but when I go to bed at night I am thankful the day is over and pray that tomorrow will be a good day.

    When I look back to the first few months of grieving I am happy that I have come as far as I have.

    Take care.

    Mary Lou

  2. Hi Everyone,

    Mary Linda, it is nice to see your name posting. I do agree that Boo has been very helpful and also yourself.Many other people on this posting have helped me by sharing their thoughts and experiences.

    I feel a a weight has been lifted of my shoulders because the holidays have come and gone and I survived the second time around.

    It is a nice feeling to know someone is always on this site.

    Kay,

    I hope 2010 will be good to you.

    Take care.

    Mary Lou

  3. Hi Ted,

    I think a bit of honesty is all most people can handle who have not lost a loved one. When asked how I am I keep it short but let them know you don't get over this kind of grief overnight and if they don't understand I really don't care because I have been true to myself and my loved one.

    It has been 18 months next month and I am able to laugh alot but sometimes it is followed with the tears.Laughing is a positive sign, part of the healing process.

    Take care.

    Mary Lou

  4. Marsha,

    In many of my grief books they suggest that the 12th to 18th month can be very difficult.Jan.21st will be 18 months for me. Sometimes I feel I am going backwards but I am thankful that this period is not as intense or long and is is taking us forward and I believe that the worst is behind us and we might start to look towards the future and not with the dreaded feeling we once had.

    Take care.

    Mary Lou

  5. Hi Everyone,

    I had a good cry this morning.I ordered Chinese food because that is what my husband and I did every year.It wasn't the same.Sometimes you can't go back only with your memories.I wanted to keep it quiet tonight but I hope I am able to go visiting tomorrow. I still have to take one day at a time after almost 18 months.I still hurt but not as bad as the first year.

    It is very comforting to see all the names posting today and into the night.

    I will say a special prayer that 2010 will be more peaceful and our grieving will be less and less as the days go on.

    Take care everyone.

    Mary Lou

  6. Hi Everyone,

    I want to share something positive with everyone. It has been 17 months since my husband died on the 21st. I thought I was getting better then the crying and depression set in again.This week the cloud has lifted again and I am looking forward to the holidays once again. I am enjoying buying presents and can't wait to spend time with my family.

    I know my grieving is not over but I am getting better.Now I am becoming my best friend.

    Who knew. I thank God and my Husband when I have good days and ask them for many more.

    Kath,

    Your posting is very powerful and I love the part about having another chance tomorrow.Those words will give me and others hope for the future.

    Mary Lou

  7. Hi Laurie,

    I think the hardest part besides missing my husband terribly is the lonliness. My daughter is 25 and soon it will be time for her to go out on her own and I am dreading that day.I do understand.

    Taking a early retirement took a big chunk out of my social life.Everyone lives so far away. I had to force myself to join a yoga club. It was my time. I am not ready to go back out into the work force yet.My self esteem needs some work.

    Marsha,

    Your words about finding out who we are again rang so true for me.I was married for 25 years and I am my own chief now and I am finding it very hard on my second year.I hope after Christmas my emotions will settle down because I am not a lot of fun to be around.I also lost my husband in July 2008.

    Lots of prayers for everyone to get us through this holiday.

    Mary Lou

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