Hi, I'm going through a similar-ish thing. My partner died suddently 5 weeks ago of a heart attack. Although we had only been together 4 years he was my soul mate. The first 3 years were great but then he injured his back and he became quite depressed and lashed out at me often. He started playing on the internet alot, I didn't think much of it as it seemed to make him happy and when he was on there he wasn't being unreasonable to me. 4 weeks before he died his back suddenly improved and he sat me down and apologised for the way he had treated me over the previous months and asked if I'd let him make it up to me - I agreed and we started making plans again. We had gone out on what he called a date 4 days before and we had booked a romantic weekend away for the weekend after he died - we were happy again - so I thought. I stayed with family for 3 days after he died and when I got home I checked his e-mails to find 3 from a woman each one becoming more desperate that he hadn't been in touch. I replied to her asking who she was and why she was e-mailing my partner. She told me that she lived abroad and that she'd been in contact with him since February and that they had planned to meet. I then found a hidden mobile bill with over 40 texts sent to a international number. I then looked over all previous bills and there were several more texts and one long phone call to her going back to February. His phone was on my contract so I received the bills but I never checked them. I know their relationship was a sham as he told her he was 37 (he was 47) that he was very sporty (he hadn't played sports since his injury) and that we'd been married for 12 years (he was married for 12 yrs but got divorced 10 yrs ago). The only comfort I can take is that he only texted her once at the beginning of June and none since, yet she sent me their last e-mail chat which was in the early hours of the day he died. I know all his loggon details so I could have checked his e-mails at any time yet I trusted him. I wish I could go back a few months and check the phone bills and e-mails and ask him why? I'm so confused was he really going to leave me for her - as she has led me to believe or did he just need someone to see him as the strong man he was before his pain? I miss him so much it physically hurts and I'm so lonely as I lost contact with all my friends over the past year while nursing him. I sit a home alone every night while this woman taunts me by e-mail.
