My mom passed away two weeks ago March 8, we were best friends/sisters and I can’t live without her, she went into cardiac arrest and passed I went to check on her she was gone, some people tell me why r u shocked your mom was very ill, but that’s not how I saw it, her heart went from 29 function to 40% thanks to dialysis, she had kidney failure, heart failure, enlarged liver and PKD she was born with, which makes u have thousands of cysts on your kidney, I was gonna be her kidney donor also, we were just waiting for a heart, she was getting better I’m stuck in a state of shock, if I hadn’t taken a nap after work I could’ve got there earlier and performed cpr, also if I was awake I could’ve drove her to hospital.. I feel like I let her down majorly she always cried at night cause she didn’t want to die, I know she heard me crying for her also, due to the messages I found after she passed, I just want her back, feels like someone is squeezing my heart and the sadness feels a dark blanket over my soul.. I just can’t take it any longer I miss her so much she was a fighter who beat hospice death dates twice, she even had feeding tube removed due to her being able to eat again... life isn’t fair