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Out On A Limb

Elizabeth A.

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Okay I'm going out on a limb here. When Herbie was put to sleep all I could think was "that will teach me to name anything after a tv character". No matter how well placed his name was (my little love bug). Due to the situation I only have a blanket with some of his fur on it.

So now it's Spring here in Florida and I'm looking around my garden. Two of my mini roses have died this past winter. Rather than leave the deadwood to sit there and look sad (somehow pointing at my failure), I have been shopping today for replacements. That's when I found it. A compact little rose bush called Herbie.

Now the idea of having a little rose out in the sunshine for all to enjoy makes me want to cry happy tears. All I wanted was for him to have a happy forever home, that home turned out to be mine.

So here I sit thinking about the little rose bush, and the chances the rose will die (they have a great 90 day guarantee as I've bought from them before) and more importantly how I will feel about it. I am not by nature a rose killer. ;) In fact I have 6 from the same original order doing just fine.

Somehow this seems to be transference. I can say for sure my husband would tell me to buy the thing (or even go behind my back and surprise me with it). Yet I hesitate. I have always found a bond in dates and names and I believe that when it feels right it probably is. Okay so my rambling is getting me nowhere. Any thoughts?


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I'd say, firstly, it doesn't even matter if it's "transference" or not. You feel whatever you feel, regardless of the cause....unless you can change the cause. So that's what you have to go by for now...how things make you feel. Maybe imagine every possible scenario involved with this one choice, and go with the one that brings you the most comfort, or, if none of them really do, the one that brings you the least amount of feeling worse.

Or, you could, depending on size of bush, plant this in a large enough planter and over-winter it somewhere where it MOST likely won't die off...or just make sure to take proper gardening precautions and protect it (the right way for that plant) out in the yard over the colder months.

I do think, regardless of what you decide, the fact that you just happened to find a rose plant that matches your Herbie's name, is pretty special and could even be a sign from him....not necessarily telling you you must buy this plant, but just that he's trying to say "hi, Mom!, I'm with you!" Very sweet, I think. And I, too, see great significance in both names, dates, and even numbers, as those are some of the ways messages from our loved ones seem to come through for a lot of people.

I also bought a mini rose bush for my Nissa last summer, put it in a lovely new pot in the garden bed, right where she always had HER mini wicker 'couch' (that is in the shed; can't look at it; can't throw it out, either), and have stored it in the garage for winter. I understand your angst, though, because for all I know it hasn't survived (it wasn't hardy to our gardening zone....hence the pot), and I'm afraid to find out it's died, too. But, I can always go get another one, I suppose, if it has. The pink colour wasn't close enough to what I thought I was getting, according to what was shown on the picture tag anyway.




Edited by Maylissa
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Thanks for your thoughts Maylissa. A tip on roses is to clip off a little branch or twig if there is any green to be seen it's still alive. If there is no green you can cut a little lower on a different stem still looking for green. The leaves don't matter in the wintertime. Some of my mini's lost all their leaves whereas others just didn't grow or add anything new all winter. My mother even commented that some of my plants she'd thought where dead are now completely leaf-ed out happy plants.

I don't think you're past the chance of last frost though. Roses actually somehow "know" the first frost and go into an almost stasis. It's very important to do as you're doing and leave it alone until all threat of frost is over. If you cut it back before last frost the plant thinks it's spring and begins to grow.

Of the two roses I lost this past winter one was in the ground and the other lives in a hanging basket. The due to it's size the Herbie plant is destined for the hanging basket so I can haul it in on freeze warning nights.

So that's a yes I've decided I will buy that little rose. I loved your comment about "Hi Mom, I'm with you". Something about the plant outside in sunshine warms my heart. It might not live forever, but let's think about it a moment. Ever funeral has flowers. Cut flowers that get thrown out and die, or the other way around. Still there are flowers sent and received to commemorate a life that was worth so much more than some stupid expensive flowers. So what if I want a Rose Bush to commemorate my Herbie's life? He was so full of love he wouldn't have begrudged anyone anything ever. A lot of people could stand to learn a little (a lot) about love from that cat. And if his flowers die, well so does everything else.

Those photos you have of Nissa are great, you have a lovely property. I can understand keeping her bed put away. I have that trouble with the blanket that I had wrapped around him the last time I held Herbie.

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  • 4 weeks later...

I ordered that rose bush. Not only that I have dug up the old "dead wood" trust me that was hard work! So now I wait a week or two for my dear sweet little Herbie bush to arrive. May it grow big and strong and bloom for many years to come.

I am planning on giving the soil a little boost too, by adding some Mircle Potting soil all around in the ground where I'm planting. Not to mention how well I had to dig up the soil to get the old one out. Seriously I was in up past my arm pits. My daughter had a great time playing with the shovel while I moaned and grunted and groaned (I know my daughter was parroting me!) with only my finger tips to pull out those roots! Something tells me it's high time she gets a child's garden set! ;)

That was last Thursday and when we went outside yesterday she wanted to know if she could dig again, perhaps she needs a sandbox too!

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  • 4 weeks later...

My little Herbie rose has been in the ground for just over a week now. It is surely struggling with browning leaves a general sad appearance. Rather as my Herbie struggled Either my husband or I has watered it everyday since it was planted. I did notice what appears to be a tiny new shoot of growth. So maybe there is hope yet.

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