The Lawyer

[benpm]

Welp,

I finally saw the lawyer. He is gonna take care of alot of things for me. He told me he would be at the closing in a week, he'd take care of the life insurance, and generally take a load off my back. He was the same lawyer that drew up my mother's will and power of attorney. This is the same law office that she worked at for like 5 years before she got to sick to work. Here I am blesses and cursed. I am blessed to have people familiar and caring about my mother helping to handle the estate. I am cursed by the embarrassment that it took me over two years to really do anything with the estate, and that my wife went into what was to be my first visit with lawyer while I was in the hospital for suicide. So he and his secretary know about that stuff. Yeah, can't wait to put this stuff behind me.

[niamh]

hi benpm,

I am glad you have someone who can take some of the pressure off you sorting out those things. It helps when someone else can take care of certain things so you can try to focus on yourself.

I don't think you have anything to be embarrassed about, 2 yrs is nothing, these things are EXTREMELY difficult to do and none of it just like grief has to fit a time schedule. You got there in the end and who cares if it took 2 yrs, I don't think that's long at all at all.

I read your other post and I can't imagine how difficult it is to find your own personal time to grieve between working and your kid. Can you find time when he's gone to bed, for yourself ? I just wish so much for some proper support from your wife for you.

All things considered I think you are doing great, you are still here, you get out of bed go to work, you help your kid with homework, you are dealing with the affairs you have to and all of that deserves one big *PAT ON THE BACK*. Others may not see these things are big coz under "normal" circumstances they are run of the mill, day to day things but after losing our loved ones, doing all these things is a big deal I think and each of us here deserves credit for just hanging on like we do. So, if you can't give yourself the credit I'm sending a ton of it your way

hugs to you,

niamh

[SHeiss]

Benpm,

I am so happy that you are getting some help with all of this. Don't be embarrassed of your past. It is the past. We learn from what we did so we don't do it again in the present. I think you are a very strong person for over coming what you have. If anything, you deserve a huge pat on that back for working through it and over coming the stresses and heartache that death can cause and pushing through it to make sure you get things done. I wish I could have your strength and courage and when my dad passes (even though I would really just like if he beat the odds and lives for a while pain free) I hope that I will be able to do what you are doing with you courage.