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A New Kind Of Loss


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I feel embarrassed to admit this but I am experiencing a new kind of loss on the grief forums. I have made some comforting contacts on this site but now I am dealing with the rejection of people who make contact with me and then stop. I don't blame it on anyone but being sensitive loss after losing my brother has left me vulnerable to new kinds of loss I never saw coming. How can I deal with the end of a friendship or relationship with a fellow forum-poster when I am already so touchy?

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Dear Elb,

I am sorry you are feeling this way. Please try not to be embarrassed. I think it a great strength to have a voice and use it and reach out. When we suffer loss, I think we do become quite hypersensitive and it is part of the process of grief I believe. I think we do with time become less hypersensitive to things that remind us of our loss. I am very proud of you for letting us know how you are feeling. I know at times I do not do a lot of posting, as I may not be feeling well, and need to take care. On Christmas Day, I did not even look at any of these forums, not because I was rejecting anyone, I did it because that is what I needed to do for myself.

I think sometimes with loss, no matter how our loved one died, or the circumstance, it is human nature I believe to go through the stage of what I call the "what if's" what if I had done this, said this, etc. I think our self-esteem takes a beating for some reason, and we may interpret things not as they are due to our intense pain.

I am sorry that this is your experience right now. I encourage you to look within your soul, your self, you will find the answers you are seeking. I send you a hug.

Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann

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