STARKISS Posted February 8, 2011 Report Share Posted February 8, 2011 BYE FAMILY Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
niamh Posted February 8, 2011 Report Share Posted February 8, 2011 Shelley, IS EVERYTHING OK ????? (((((((((hugs)))))))) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beakerj Posted February 8, 2011 Report Share Posted February 8, 2011 Hey Shelley,let us know you're still there ok? I have been reading your posts & really feeling for you...I have massive respect for your courage & determination. Hang in there. Much love XXXX Becka Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted February 8, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 8, 2011 Hi Family Sorry if I worried everyone I am just taking a break and going to check out some sexual abuse websites to see if I can get some help... Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beakerj Posted February 8, 2011 Report Share Posted February 8, 2011 Hi Shelley, thanks for the reassurance. I hope the sites Marty pointed out are some real help to you...I will be thinking of you with your meeting with your family soon. Hang in there. XXXX Becka Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunstreet Posted February 8, 2011 Report Share Posted February 8, 2011 Dear Shelley, Thank you for the reassurance...know that we all "CARE FOR YOU" Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
niamh Posted February 8, 2011 Report Share Posted February 8, 2011 THANKS SHELLEY, always here for you and thinking of you. I'm sure I speak for lots of us here when I say we will be with you in spirit for your meeting with family. I'm with Becka too for the courage and determination you have. Sending you a ((SUPER HUG)) and hope you will find some people who can relate and that it will be another bit of help and support,can never get enough of that. Much love and comfort to ya Hun, N xox Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted February 20, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 20, 2011 Hi Family, I am feeling really low right now but I will start calling the numbers on my help list till I find one to talk with me... I am missing my mom so very much and wonder what if I did tell her about my dad... Would she have stopped it or would our family be torn apart and would I have no family right now to talk too.. I know that I only tried to spare her of all the sadness it would have given her to know what her husband done to his daughter.I have had been thinking alot of what my life has been like and I know that it would have been different if I did tell when it first happen.. My mom would have maybe had a rougher life because she would have been so hurt and sadden from what he did.. i am glad that she never knew and that I atleast spared her of this pain because she had so much in her life all ready... shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted March 15, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 15, 2011 Hi Family, I just have to tell you all that if it was not for all of you I would not be here today, I have had some really emotional times lately with everything that I have been through... I have had some really bad anger issues dealing with the lost of my childhood home, my parents deaths, loss of all my friends, my dog chelsea who is my only true love... I have had severe anger issues over the abuses from my dad... I have even had times where I thought about ending all of it and just leaving this place.... I am truly blessed to have family and friends from here to help me... Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted March 20, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 Hi Family, Just wanted to let everyone know that I am back on my medication and feeling so much better... I went off the medication for a few months and that is why I was so low... I hate the medication but as my therapist's said if I want to get better than I have to take it and think of it this way that I have a sickness like diabetes and not relate it to mental health if that is the reason I stopped taking it.. I hate that I have depression and anxiety problems but I do... Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Nicholas Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 You must take your medication as prescribed by your doctor and don't alter the regime without his/her approval; depression and anxiety are nothing to be ashamed of, millions of people worldwide suffer from it/them, you'd be amazed who does, even people you know but never suspected. One of my cousins suffered terribly from depression and decided to stop his medication without consulting his doctor. I won't upset you by saying what happened to him, but tragically he is no longer with us. Nicholas Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunstreet Posted March 22, 2011 Report Share Posted March 22, 2011 Dear Shelley, I am glad you decided to go back on your med's. The Pharmacy professional I am knows the consequences of coming off med's to quickly and can actually worsen our symptoms severely. It may be Shelley that you will not need med's always but I do believe they do a play an important role at times and are neccessary. I agree with Nicholas that there is no reason to grab onto shame. It is not your fault! I also agree with Nicholas that if you choose to come off again, do so under the guidance of your doctor and therapist. I see you working so hard and continue to be so proud of you Shelley. Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted March 25, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 25, 2011 Hi Carol Ann, Thanks for always being there to help me whenever I needed someone... I know that the medication is important but I hate taking medication and it just seems something different every year that I have had to take some kind of medication and I am so sick of hearing your are sick this way and you need to take this medication... I have had tumors, or prediabetes, or something different and it just means another medication... shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted March 29, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 29, 2011 Hi Family I have agreed to go by on my medication but have not had the money to pay for it so I am presently no on the medication and I am feeling really low right now and just need to vent something out... I know that my family tells me they care but if they really cared about me they would have done something with the remains of my parents and not have waited so long... I need the closure and I am so very scared to talk to them because I do not want to cause anymore fights... I am scared that even if I tell them they will still not do anything... Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Robert27 Posted March 29, 2011 Report Share Posted March 29, 2011 Hi Shelley I just want to Say I'm so sorry your haveing such a hard time right now, and what your going threw, I just want to say I Care, and I know so many on here Care so very much about You, I'll be Praying for you. I hope things get much better, just know Were all for you on here, and you have many friends here! Robert27 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted April 9, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 9, 2011 Thanks Everyone, for all your posts in this area, I have been really low lately... I have gone back on my meds and still hate having to take pills... I am coming up to the 7th anniversary of my mom's death and eventhough it has been 7 years I still miss her so very much.. I have been told at work I am going to be relocated to another school and I hate the idea of starting somewhere all over again... How sad is it now??? Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted May 13, 2011 Author Report Share Posted May 13, 2011 Hi All, I so want to say Good Bye and make it forever I have had such a rough time and no one around me cares or understands... Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Robert27 Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 I'm Sorry to here that your feeling so down right now Shelley, I know I'm not by myself here at griefhealing that all of us Care about you and Wish Things were so much better, all I can Say Shelley is, That I care and I'm Sorry your haveing such a hard time, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted June 6, 2011 Author Report Share Posted June 6, 2011 Hi Robert27, Thanks so much for all the kindness and encouragement.. My therapist says that it would be a good ideal to see my doctor as she thinks the medication might need changing for me as my moods seem really off right now... I feel that I have been in a dark hole lately and just can not see the light... I just feel that WHY AM I BEING PUNISHED SO MUCH... I know this sounds really selfish and I am sorry it does... I know that there are so many people out there right now who are suffering with so much pain but I WISH IT WAS ALL OVER AND GOD WOULD TAKE ME HOME ALL READY... SHELLEY Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Robert27 Posted June 7, 2011 Report Share Posted June 7, 2011 Hi Shelley I wanted to let you know I sent you a email message, to reply to this post it will be in your inbox right here at griefhealing. Thank You very much for your friendship! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted June 22, 2011 Author Report Share Posted June 22, 2011 Hi All, Just wanted you to know that I am still here but feel like I want to leave so very badly lately, it is really hard now because my beloved chelsea is going to leave me too... My mom left me, my dad left me, and now chelsea is going to leave me... I so want to leave to so that I can be with them all.. I have my good days but with the rainy weather it is so much harder to stay on track and with my siblings so far away and not really caring too much if I live or die it is really hard to stay on track here... Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mfh Posted June 23, 2011 Report Share Posted June 23, 2011 We are all with you, Shelley and in the same boat. Know that you are not alone. We all care. Mary Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted June 26, 2011 Author Report Share Posted June 26, 2011 Hi All, Thanks for all your concerns and caring words, I am okay and just have so much inside of me right now and I am finding really hard to keep on the positive note... I am sad, and very emotional right now, I feel like this monster inside of me and he is trying so hard to come out... I am feeling like I am getting kicked inside of me... Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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