BellaRosa Posted March 11, 2011 Report Share Posted March 11, 2011 Today is my dad's birthday. It's the first one since my mom passed in November. I feel absolutely awful for him, but even more so today. I told him that we can do whatever he wants: if he wants to go out then we'll go out, if he wants to stay home then we'll stay home, if he wants to ignore it completely then we'll do that. He said the other day that he wants to acknowledge the day in some way because he knows that's the right thing to do, but he doesn't know what he can handle. I told him to wait and see how he's feeling later. My heart is just breaking for him. My mom should be here with him. He shouldn't be alone. He's only 58 and now has to live the rest of his life without her. It's just all so unfair. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
niamh Posted March 12, 2011 Report Share Posted March 12, 2011 Oh Becka I know those days are extra tough,birthday wishes to your Dad,what did you do for it? I've had one with my Mom too and was so heartbroken for her,like I am every day but her birthday was extra hard. I hate that my Dad and I could not plan the surprise for her like other years that now it's me on my own shopping for her. It is beyond unfair. As always I just have no words Becka so sending hugs to you and your Dad Niamh xo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BellaRosa Posted March 14, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 14, 2011 Thanks, Niamh. It was an awful day. My anxiety was almost unbearable and everything just felt kind of "off," you know? We ended up going out for dinner to a new place -- I don't think any of us could bear to do something that we had done with my mom. It would have been too hard and too obvious that she wasn't there. And now this week I have to deal with St. Patrick's Day without her as well as the four month mark -- both on the same day. It just never ends, does it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
niamh Posted March 14, 2011 Report Share Posted March 14, 2011 Yep I get it Becka,unfortunately.we always went for dinner for our birthdays,I haven't been able to do the "normal" thing,it's just all wrong without Dad. Hun I'm sorry this week is so rotten.....again unfortunately I get it. Thursday is 15 months without my Dad and because the days match the dates again this month i find it so much harder. I just keep thinking this time 15mnths my life was normal and I had no clue of the horror ahead.I'm thinking of the simple things like what I ate on the Monday,right now it's about 1 hour from the moment my Dad asked me to bring him to the hospital,his last time ever being at home.it's all so so hard,I wish the week was over. I hate reliving those moments. I wish as always there were words of comfort Becka but big huge (((HUG)))) is all I have. I'll be thinking of you Becka Niamh x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
niamh Posted March 16, 2011 Report Share Posted March 16, 2011 Erin......I AM SO EMBARASSED calling you Becka,got the nicknames mixed up. So just wanted to send you big apology. ((hugs)) Niamh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BellaRosa Posted March 17, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 17, 2011 Please don't worry about it at all! No need to apologize. You've been so helpful and understanding, you can call me whatever you want! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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