Beccagirl21

Hi, I just came across this, and I totally understand where you are coming from. I lost my mother to cancer a little over 5 years from today. I just wanted to you to know I am with you and share a bit of my experience with grieving. When she passed, I was in 9th grade, and I felt like I couldn't press pause with my life. So, I blocked it out, and kept my mind busy. When I tried to think about it, similar to you, not a single tear would drop. I tried writing to her in notebooks, talked to her before I went to sleep at night, and still no tears. Since then, I graduated high school and finished my first year in college. It is only now that I can experience these deep, unresolved feelings. I definitely feel the waves, but it gets a little easier to feel over time. Now when I write to her, I imagine what she might think or say and I sob. I'm not saying these things to make it sound like fearful experience, but you are definitely not alone in nit feeling anything for a while. You got this, and your feelings are completely valid.