Wishmaster

[Ztyu123]

I wish that I could have......

 

 

Held you more....

 

 

Spent time with you more.....

 

 

Kissed you more....

 

Told you that I love you more...

 

Showed you that I loved you more....

 

Talked to you more....

 

Listened to you more....

 

Saw you more...

 

Spoke to you more...

 

Spent more time with you outdoors more...

 

Let you sleep with me more....

 

Cuddled with you more ...

 

Fed you better..

 

Loved you better...

 

Shown you better....

 

I regret.....

 

Not protecting you more....

 

Not having a better environment for you...

 

All the times I didn't have time for you...

 

All the times I lost patience..

 

All the times you wanted more of me and I was too sick.....

 

I couldn't make your life any better...

 

If I made it any worse or worse....

 

That they you weren't loved and seen for who and what you truly were....

 

That I'm selfish..was and is..

 

That I don't know the proper pronouns, grammar, and punctuation to identify you and your state now....

 

 

 

 

That you were enslaved.....

 

That you were discriminated against...

 

All the times I or someone else got your hopes up, only to disappoint you ....

 

 

 I couldn't have cured your depression....

 

 

All of your unhappiness and pain ...

 

 

All the broken promises....

 

 

All the unspoken and unshown I love yous....

 

 

 

That I get to stare at your empty bed now...

 

 

That I get to sniff and try to preserve your scent on toys, bedding, linen now...

 

That you're not here ...

 

That I can't find you...

 

That I don't get to know if you're okay and happy now ..

 

That I don't get to know if we'll ever be reunited again..

 

That I don't get to know if you still love me or if you ever did...

 

That I don't know if you know how truly sorry I am....

 

 

That I get to spend the rest of my life living with you only in my heart and memories ..

 

That all there is now are only metaphoricals, not literals..

 

 

 

That these wishes will never gain action...

 

That these regrets won't be given optimism