I Have No Parents

[charley]

Hi, I'm 24 years old and on the 2nd december 2003 my whole world crumbled around me. I lost my mum to breast cancer. She had been in remission for a year and then we found out that it had spred to her bones and liver. she died within 2 months. I feel so shocked because no one ever said said that there was nothing that they could do. She went in for her chemo and died the next day. I know that i shouldn't be so shocked, but i can't help it. My mum was mum best friend she was only 45 when she died. She has helped me to raise my son, who is so low at the moment. my dad died on the 13th march99 aged 41from a heart attack. I do have 1 sister but we seem to be driffting apart. I just feel so lonley. I know that i should grow up but i feel like a 5 year old lost in a supermarket.

[jodi]

hi stacie,

thank u for ur kind words of encouragement, they do mean something. you have a good heart, especially at such a young age, dealing with such huge losses. i wish there was something i can say to help you, but i am left speechless. i feel like a crybaby after reading about other people's losses. but i cant minimize my loss either. it is what it is, and losing my mother was like losing both my parents, since she was the reason we all came over their house. i wish i had a sister like u. i have 2 brothers, and they are there for each other, like theyve always been, and my mom was always there for me. i never really sought other close friendships b/c i didnt feel that they would ever care as much, so now i literally have nobody but my daughter. but i dont burden my daughter with this cuz i dont want to ruin her day. so, i just try to get thru this on my own. its tough tho, but at the same time, i wouldnt want to bother any1 else either.

i dont know, i think in the end, the only thing that will help us is time. and during that time, life goes on and moves us along to the next chapter in our life, and as we grow older, these losses teach us how valuable it is to live ur life to the fullest. cuz u never know when its ur turn to go. i just want to start living again, but i just cant get out of this corner right now. good luck to you. ~jodi