My Grandmothers Alzheimer's Disease

[Guest Gamer205]

Hello all,

its been a while since I've had to post anything here, but right now my family and I are going threw a Storm, My Grandmother has Alzheimer's disease and She is really going down bad, What makes this even worse is, I'm haveing to See my Dad see his mother like this, and its almost as History is repeating itself for all of us, because back in 1996 We had to See my grandpaul Die of Prostate cancer a misrable misrable death, and now Were haveing to go threw this, I Can't begin to explain or try to tell just what a great and careing person my grandmother was, very good Christan lady and the best heart in this world, Cared about everybody,

I had been going to see her this past year, and she was doing ok you know for someone to be haveing Alzheimer's disease, She looked good and could talk well, and she wasen't that confused at first, but then things quickly turned for the worst, Last time I can remeber a good day with her was back in the Summer, I had went to see her at the nurseing home and she told me she loved me and gave me a big hug,

I had heard about 3 months ago I think it was that She had a terriable fall, and that she hit her head as well as landed very hard on her hip, and We believe now that thats what caused her to go down so badly, and get worse cause after that She has been someone you don't even know, I've often heard falls can cause the disease to get much much worse,

I had quit going out there when I heard how bad she was getting I guess cause I'm not good at faceing things like that and maybe scared a little bit too, I finaley decicded I was going to go out there maybe for my last time, and I was not prepared for what I was about to see, All my Family had told me how bad she had gotten, but its one thing to here about it, its another thing to see it with your own eyes,

I went out there this past weekend, and I had never been more wanting to leave then I was when I seen just how bad she had gotten, My regular family was seeing her on a very normal basics, I just couldn't bring myself to see her like she has been, but I thought I should given it could be my last chance,

I went to see her this past weekend, and it just killed me inside, She had lost over 50 lbs She looks basicaly like someone on a death bed, she can't Speak, She can't eat, she had written in her will before she ever got to the point that she couldn't make her own disisions that she did not want anything to keep her alive includeing feeding tubes, so they have to honor that,

She was looking around, She looks so bad, I mean and she has the Saddest look on her face, it just killed me, and it was just 4 years ago that She was living on her own and everything and now on the brink of death,

I've never seen a more sadder look on a persons face and she looks nothing but skin and bones, and she looks as if she is going to burst out crying with tears, it just kills me to see her like that, I really really dont expect her to be here by Febuary it would not suprise me at all,

I've dealt with my friend's death back in 2004, and like I said in 1996 We delt with my grand paul dieing a misrable death by prostate cancer, and My Dad was dignoised with type 2 Dybeaties just this past year, and I'm haveing to see him deal with his mom and see her like she is, its just hard on all of us, and I'm so sad to see him eventualy haveing to deal with her passing, I'm almost and I know it sounds bad but I'm almost wishing this would all just hurry up and pass, cause its so terriably hard to deal with and know when your so close to someone like this, it just makes you question everything, why nice and Careing people that would do anything for you have to go threw such pain and such a disease and leave the World like this?

anyway Thanks to everyone here for your support, and I thought I had to post this to at least talk with someone about it.

I wish everyone a Super 2010 year and the very best.

Thank You for your time.

[MartyT]

My dear Robert,

I'm so very sorry to learn this awful news, and I can only imagine how difficult and challenging this must be for you, your grandmother, you dad, and the rest of your family. It was very brave of you to face your fears and visit your grandmother in spite of her condition -- obviously it was very hard for you to see her like that. But you did it anyway. That is the very definition of courage, my friend.

Sometimes we have a misguided notion of courage; we label as brave the soldier who is the first to march into battle, and we think of courage as the capacity to be strong and silent when we’re in pain, or as the ability to handle sorrow and woundedness all by ourselves without ever seeking outside help or intervention.

But real courage is the willingness to take a risk, to face something very difficult without running away from it, to embrace our fears and learn to cope with them.

Please know that we are thinking of you and your family at this sad time, Robert, and I hope you'll continue to come here to talk with us whenever you feel a need to do so. You're still an important and valued member of our family here, too.

[Guest Gamer205]

Marty I just want to say Thank You so much and You have no idea how much you and everyone else here means to me.