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Trauma In Our Family

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I started posting here this week. I need to list some things that happened, all within the last few years.

1. My husband was diagnosed with kidney cancer in April 2007. I was his caregiver for almost a year.

2. My 37-year-old son was diagnosed with mesothelioma of the abdomen in 2008, 2 months before my husband died. He is in remission, thank God.

3. My husband died with cancer on April 6, 2008.

4. I was diagnosed with breast cancer in March of 2009. I am now in remission.

5. My beloved pet cat, Tigger, died on March 6, 20l0.

I know I could not have gone through all this without my faith in God. I come from a very abusive family of origin and have been in recovery for a long time. I was told in the 90's that I have PTSD and was treated for it. Perhaps that treatment healed me of it. Without the things I have learned in l2 Step programs and church I would have imploded long ago. This is a great way to express all this. I am grateful someone gave me this website address this week.

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Hi, I'm Kat! First let me say how sorry I am for your losses! It will be 10 months on the 23rd of this month that I lost my husband to a very aggressive form a prostate cancer. He was diagnosed in September of 2008. We only had 9 months after finding out that he was sick. We weren't told that he had less than a year. Actually, I was told by the oncologist that he had seen people live 5 to 10 years, so that is what I was holding on to. If I would have known he had less than a year I would have handled alot of things differently. I can also identify with your love for your beloved Tigger. I have a poodle that will be 18 years old this June. I can't imagine loosing him right now.

I have been told numerous times that God had a plan for my husband and He needed him. Frankly, I think God's plan stinks but I do believe that he doesn't give us more that what we can handle. We just have to put our trust in Him and take one day at a time. We will sometimes feel we are really making real progress and then something will happen and it seems like we fall back a couples steps. I've learned that it is okay.

The people on this site are wonderful. Sometimes I just need to talk to someone and there is always someone here that will listen to me. I have learned one thing and that is I am not alone and alot of what I am feeling is normal. So, if you just need to talk we are here to listen.

Take care,


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I too am sorry for your loss and can associate with your series of bad happenings. In just a years time I lost 2 childhood friends, then our beloved Golden Retriever died suddenly the morning before our oldest daughters wedding, 4 months later very unexpectedly I lost my husband, then within the next 4 months I lost a Grandmother to cancer, my Mom was diagnosed with not only Lupus but lung cancer, my Grandmother developed Alzheimers and had to be put in a nursing home and was devastated by the loss of a relationship that now looking back I wish never happened. Somehow I am getting through this and know that you will too..it just takes time. Coming here and expressing yourself is a good way to start and great therapy for yourself


Wendy :wub:

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