My Daddy, Sweet Daddy

[Daughter2010]

*Sigh*...I miss my dad. Father's day is around the corner and this will be the first one without him. Last year I spent the weekend with him and the family while he was going to his chemo treatments. He was doing OK at that moment.

I know my father is some place else, pain free and resting...but I can't help missing him.

I know this is rambling, but I wanted to express it out there. I don't cry as much as in the beginning but God, I wish I could hug my daddy one more time. The bond father-daughter is one that cannot be broken despite physical death.

I don't know what I will do this Sunday, I just know last year daddy was with me and now he is somewhere else.

Life has its cycles and we all go through them. For some, the cycles are longer than for others. I don't know how long I will live or how long will it be until I see my father again. I just know I miss him, and still cant understand, nor will understand how he was called home so soon. My father is part of me, and even though I am like him in some ways, I just wish I could hug him and see those happy hazel eyes.

Every time I start writing about dad, tears start flowing down my cheeks. Daddy is in that foreign country that none of us really know about, and I miss him so much. My brother sees him in dreams quite often since he passed...I've had a couple of dreams only. I wish I would see him more often.

Hughs to all daughters out there and to everyone who has lost a father.

Happy father's day to our daddies, wherever they may be now.

-L

[loulou]

I miss my sweet daddy too.I have been missing him so much.I miss him making me laugh.Last summer I spent alot of time with my dad hanging out with the little ones in my backyard.Now when I'm in the yard,I can see him,and it seems so close,but he is far far away.Father's day is like a shot to the heart for me.I feel like the biggest part of me is gone...well it is.My father and I were very much alike.We look alike,talk alike,have the same humor,and same temper.My daddy was so very young.I dont understand losing him in his 40's.I cant even except it.I feel so young myself.I feel like the only solid person in my life has left me alone.My dad doesn't come to me in dreams.I always read,that if you ask them for signs,they will always give them to you.Well I have been asking him to show me a sign for a week,and nothing.No sign at all.Makes me wonder.....I miss you dad.Happy fathers day.I love you so much,and I need you in my life.I'm lost without you.

[Daughter2010]

Yes loulou, that's the legacy our daddies left us with. Mom says I am a lot like dad personality wise,and temper as well. I talked to mom on the phone and she was at her best friend's house, they went to college together and it was her hubby's birthday. That is one of the first get together s for her without my dad. He would always go with her to social gatherings and stuff. I feel so nostalgic, daddy is not here. Death is hard to comprehend, the separation is hard to comprehend, why are our parents taken away from us at such young age for them....

To serve a purpose perhaps, it is just that I look at my family photo on the nightstand and everything seems so surreal.

My friends are all happy with their lives but none of them has lost a parent yet and all of this is hard.

Father's day is a hard one for a daddy's girl like me

A year ago I was with Daddy and this year is different. I am strong but tonight all these memories from dad are coming to me and i just wished i understood more about all of this, maybe then it wouldn't hurt as much as it does now.

-L

[niamh]

hi Daughter2010,

I hope you got through yesterday ok. I was thinking of everyone on here missing their Dads. I haven't been on to write in a while, been having such a hard time.

yesterday was so hard. I was with some of Dad's family, uncle and cousins sat night so felt some tiny comfort just being around my Uncle. It was hard leaving them yesterday, coming home knowing Dad was not gonna be there. Sometimes I don't feel part of a family anymore when it's just me and Mom, I just wish my life had never taken this turn. I will never understand why as long as I am on this earth, I don't think there is a silver lining at the end of this cloud.

I too am very like my Daddy, Mom always said it and I still do things and she laughs saying how exactly like him I am.

I absolutely agree when you talk about the separation being hard to comprehend. I often wonder what life is all about now, what my purpose is here....I don't feel like there is a purpose anymore for me, other than being there for my Mom ....that's all I do now is survive & hang tough for her sake but hating every minute of it all. I just want to wake up from this nightmare yet I can't, there's no way out.

I left a card up with Dad yesterday, I sat with him for an hour or so and wished I could stay there forever.

I keep hoping it won't be too long until I see him again. Truth is I always hope my life is not meant to be very long, as horrible as that sounds. Although I would never want to leave my Mom all alone the fear of her leaving me is overwhelming. I guess I often hope we will just be taken together to be with him.

I wish he would give me a hug, I've heard of people feeling hugs from their loved ones. I'm just sad, lonely, lost and empty without my Daddy here.

Love to all you special Daddy's girls from another,

niamh

xoxo