niamh Posted July 8, 2010 Report Share Posted July 8, 2010 I miss my Daddy so so so much. I'm feeling SO LONELY. I've been hating the summer weather because of all the reminders. Now it's raining, dull and dreary and it's reminding me of winter, end of the year and reminders of all the horrors. I feel lonely no matter whether I am on my own or around people, nothing will ever fill this emptiness, I really feel dead inside, that now I'm just a shell with all these living organs that won't stop working. Just feeling like Dad deserted me and left me here to fend for myself when I just don't want to, I just barely exist now. I'm still annoyed that he no longer has to care or worry about anything in this life, I'm angry that I've been left here to deal with this all on my own never knowing the day nor the hour when I will see him again. I beg him everyday not to leave me here too long. I need my Dad so much, I need a hug from him, I just want a real good long chat with him, I need his support, his unconditional love. I just want him here to hold me and tell me it will be ok. I can't do a whole other lifetime without him. I am so weary from life, from the last 29 weeks to the day, so broken from the pain of it all knowing the only fix will be the day I get to be with him. I just want to hit the fast forward button, it's not like I will miss out on anything, it's already ended as far as I am concerned. I JUST WANT MY DADDY BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!! UGH ok need to hold back the tears in work so have to stop this now, just needed to get some of it out. thanks for listening, niamh xo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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