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First Anniversary - Need Some Advice


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The first anniversary of my son Andy's death is coming up this week. We wanted to make the day special and spend it with my surviving son, his wife and our two year old grandson. We made plans to spend the day doing some of Andy's favorite things - baseball in the park, water skiing, boating - maybe even spending some time at the zoo, with a barbecue of his favorite foods to finish off the day... unfortunately the weather is calling for rain and maybe even snow (no, we don't live in the Yukon!) so a day outside isn't looking likely. What do other people do to make this day special? We don't' belong to a church, our son isn't buried so visiting a grave-site isn't an option. Does anyone have any ideas that will allow us to be together and celebrate his life, rather than just feel sad over his death? Any suggestions would be helpful!

Thanks,

Linda Darcy

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Hi Linda Darcy. My Mother died on November 1st 2009. I spend most holidays alone, but commemorating one year since the passing of my Mother will be different. I will need to be with family on this occasion. What's left of my family is either my siblings or my Mother's brother. The setting and circumstance almost doesn't matter to me. If I can be with family, that will be enough. Probably the occasion will be a dinner with drinks. I do hope to go through photo albums with other family members. Thanks for reminding me; I had not yet thought of the one year mark; now I can plan. - Ron B.

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  • 1 month later...

The first anniversary of my daughter's death is coming up this weekend. We are raising her 12 yr.old and left it up to her for activities. The week of the funeral last year saw my other 2 daughters and their husbands, plus my 2 yr.old grandaughter as houseguests/helpers,etc. We've gone on vacation with them so that's what it was like that week. We had lots to eat thanks to friends and relations. Lots of visitors which lent a party atmosphere. On quiet nights, we all played board games, like we do on vacation, so that's what we'll do. Our church gave us a candle with our daughter's name on it and we'll light that for an hour or so. We have a church service to attend for her and a cemetery visit, as well. I think there will be tears, but we'll be okay.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Hi, we had a memorial bench put in the park for my dad and everyone came to the park and we had a big picnic and all the children played games, it was sombre but nice, i didnt enjoy it because i felt like he shouldve been there but other people thought it was good cuz it was what he enjoyed-having fun, being around people. And the kids enjoyed it, it was a good atmosphere for my 8 year old brother to be in, rather than everyone crying (which is what we did on his birthday)

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