Sympathy Pledge

[sunstreet]

I found this in a google search at the following site:

http://www.simplesympathy.com

I thought it would be good to share with all of you.

Hand it to those who say comments that are not helpful.

Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann

The Simple Sympathy Pledge

I will not worry about having the "perfect" thing to say.

I will not expect you to "get on with your life" or "get over it."

I will respect the grieving process as being highly unique and lay aside my ideas about what is "normal."

I will not say, "I know exactly how you feel."

I will listen with my heart.

I will value emotions as something that need to be expressed.

I will not make the conversation about me.

I will value empathy as an essential human virtue that should be cultivated, practiced and modeled to future generations.

I will place more value compassion than having the right answers.

I will do the little things that help make one day a little easier.

I will keep sympathy simple and unfettered by advice, solutions, pat answers or attempts to fix grief.

[Queeniemary]

Thanks for sharing this Carol Ann, there are still friends (not close friends) who yet have to mention Michael to me to this day. Knowing how to respond to someone's grief is not easy. I know now a lot more than I did, but before I know that I did not understand.

Mary (Queeniemary) in Arkansas

[Lainey]

I wish I had had this to show my "friend" the other day.

I have to admit that, like Mary, I've learned much about grieving due to my own grief. Before this happened to me, I was uncomfortable around people that suffered a loss.

Thanks for sharing this site Carol Ann, it's bookmarked as a favorite.

Lainey

[Deb625]

I wish I had had this to show my "friend" the other day.

I have to admit that, like Mary, I've learned much about grieving due to my own grief. Before this happened to me, I was uncomfortable around people that suffered a loss.

Thanks for sharing this site Carol Ann, it's bookmarked as a favorite.

Lainey

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I know I've said that the only thing I can think of for "why" did this have to happen to me is someone had to be first amongst my peers (I'm 44), someone had to learn just how devastating this is and the the sheer depth of loss... I have been blessed with loving support from friends and family, and they empathise well, but don't truley underdstand. It is so different losing a spouse - the person who has been an integral part of your everyday, who shares in your thoughts, plans and future... We will get through. Take Care, Deb