Peace In Your Heart

[MartyT]

These wise words come to us from dear friend and respected colleague Laurel Lagoni. (You'll find more of Laurel's helpful and informative articles here: Veterinary Wisdom® for Pet Parents )

"The only way I can get him back is to be happy, to feel peace in my heart, to live the way he showed me to live, and to make use of the gifts he gave me." --Unknown

I found these wise words scribbled on a piece of scrap paper when I was sorting through a pile of papers on my desk. The words were surrounded by quotation marks, which usually means I wrote them down while talking to someone on the telephone. This time, though, I forgot to make note of the speaker!

And I regret that because whoever spoke these profound words deserves credit for understanding the key to healing our feelings of grief.

Grieving doesn't mean replaying hurtful memories over and over again in our minds. And it doesn't mean continuing to relive the painful feelings we associate with loss either. Yet, that's what many of us believe grief to be: Feeling lousy. Staying with the sadness. Living less than whole lives.

It's as if we believe we have been "chosen" to bear the pain of losing someone dear to us and now we must "honor" that task by never feeling joy again. Continuing to grieve, we believe, keeps us connected to the loved one who has died. It would be disloyal to feel anything else!

Yet, nothing could be further from the truth.

The process of grieving is simply another name for the process of healing. Grieving means finding the love that remains even though loss has occurred.

When we focus our minds on the memories of what our loved one taught us and gave us and, when we incorporate those lessons into who we are now, we find meaning and personal growth.

Our loved ones who die, especially our pets who love us unconditionally, don't want us to feel lousy out of loyalty to them! Hey, they loved us! And anyone who truly loves you wants you to be happy, right?

If you're feeling sad and depressed because you're grieving, allow yourself to truly FEEL those feelings, down to the tips of your toes, and then release them and move on to the feelings of love.

Feel peace in your heart and make use of the gifts your pet or your human loved one gave you.