Need Support ~ Have To Go Into Court Again On Monday

[Dwaynecg]

Carol Ann,

I hope every thing went well for you today. I said a Prayer for you this morning. Keep your spirit on high.

God Bless You

Dwayne

[mfh]

I lit a candle for you today...and hope things went well. Why are they holding court on a holiday? That had to feel strange in and of itself. Anyway, I hope it all went well for you. And keep dancing with that cat. mfh

[sunstreet]

Hey Becka,

So good to see your typeface again.. Thanks for your support. Oh yes, what joy and healing our fur babies bring us hey.. I am inspired by you, by everyone here, thank you.

******

Dear Dwayne,

Thank you so much. Things went well today. My spirit feels on high but a bit weepy which is understandable.

******

Dear MFH,

Again, thanks for lighting a candle for me. I have mine lit now...and just as I am telling you I realize it is the first time ever that I am lighting a candle for me.....oh my Melissa is smiling for sure. No holiday here in British Columbia, our holiday Monday was last Monday ~ Victoria Day. Memorial Day is a stat day for you folks down there in the USA....

******

I was able to complete my testimony without breaking down; and managed through the cross examination. The judge will rule on the matter in one week's time. I was disappointed with this but my lawyer is encouraged.

I am so grateful to all of you who offered your support, care and concern for me; thank you. I feel at peace with and within myself at a deeper level now. The only thing missing is Melissa to hold; to hug; to say I love you. I know though she rests in a deeper peace now as well and that comforts me.

I am very tired so will say goodnight to all.

Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann

[mfh]

Carol Ann

I am so glad it went smoothly. I think the judge holding back a bit is good news...he is not just throwing out facts etc. I did not know you were in BC...I thought perhaps you were in some small small small town (I live in one) and we sometimes do things differently. You held together...super....and you spoke your truth and I honor your courage. Melissa WAS there...I believe. She knows. Get some rest now. mfh

[Guest Nicholas]

Good luck!

Nicholas

[Dwaynecg]

Carol Ann

I am so proud of you for holding up so well. With all ou suport I am sure it is going to in your favor. I will keep you in my prayers.

God Bless you

Dwayne

[sunstreet]

Dear MFH,

Thank you and after some more discussion with my lawyer I too now think it good the judge is taking some time. Just the same I'll be happiest when it is complete. Thank you for honoring my courage. Yes, Melissa was there; as she resides in my heart forever. I felt her presence quite strong. Thank you for your support of me.

Dear Nicholas,

Thank you so much! I encourage you too Nicholas! Do that which feeds your soul and the rest will fall into place.

Dear Dwayne,

Thank you so much. I feel so supported. I only hope that I am even a smidgeon of support and help to all of you.

Blessings and Courage to all, Carol Ann

[kayc]

Carol Ann,

I am so sorry, I don't know how I missed this post, I wish I could have been there for you as you went into court, but thank God you at least had all of these other dear people here for you.

When you told your story this time, I felt I got a more complete picture instead of bits and pieces comprising a whole picture. I want to tell you, I feel you are strong. I have learned that strength has nothing to do with how you feel...many of us do not "feel" strong, but we are. I am so PROUD of you for having the courage to do the right thing and bring people to accountability that needed to be.

I also want to address your comment about feeling you somehow let Melissa down because of the situation with the therapist. Carol Ann, you did not let anyone down, you were a victim. You were not responsible for what happened, I hope you can come to realize that. A therapist, teacher, judge, parent, priest, boss, ANYONE in authority or who holds an imbalance of power with us, in other words we look to them for direction and guidance, and they abuse that power by preying on our vulnerability, they are a predator and should be brought to justice! To abuse one's position of authority in this way is deplorable! Some friends of mine were seeing a marriage counselor and he took advantage of the wife and darn near caused the total disintegration of their 30 year marriage! I urged them to together sue him and they are, and it's the best thing they could have done...it got them on the same page, and they have begun counseling with someone else and their marriage is not only surviving, but thriving under his direction and help.

I could so relate to what you said about having to learn and play their system to get out (psy. care)...it reminded me, when I used to have a prison ministry, I've heard the same thing...they have to learn to play along with the system and learn what it is the system wants and demands from them in order to gain release and integration back into society. A lot of people view that as phoney and of no good, but there's another way of looking at it too...much of our life we have to do the same thing. Take school for instance...those who do the best in school have the ability to glean what it is the teacher is getting at and wanting and giving them just that...we do that on the job, everywhere. With people who are very honest, it goes against their grain, they want to be authentic...well they still can be, to those they are close to.

You have been through so much, it is no wonder you are such a wise and empathetic person.

I live in Oregon and right now the City of Portland is wanting to include sex change operations in their insurance coverage. It is a big debate. Some people think this isn't the time to cost the city an additional $32,000...when they are already spending multimillions on their health insurance coverage, that is pocket change. As the mayor says, it's about doing the right thing. One person went on t.v. and said "I'm all for gay rights too, but...blah blah blah" and I thought "You idiot! You just showed your ignorance! This isn't about sexuality, this is about GENDER!" Clearly they don't know enough to know the difference! Grrr! How far we have to come as a society. I will say, I am sorry there is ANY segment of people in our society that has to fight so hard to be treated with care and respect! And least of all, a people that didn't choose how they are, but are born as is. A lot of people think there are heterosexuals and homosexuals, when in actuality, there are many other classifications as well. We truly have a long ways to go, and until the majority of our society is educated, understanding will be limited at best. I am sorry you have to fight that fight too when you already have your plate full with physical infirmity and grief as well as righting the wrongs that have been inflicted.

I am so proud of this very caring site, that although they may not all understand each person's situation fully, they lend their full support and open their hearts to each other, because we truly are all in this together. It's our similarities that bind us...it is our differences that applaud our uniqueness.

Please continue to keep us posted as to the full outcome of how this goes. We are all there beside you in spirit, cheering you on.

[sunstreet]

Dear Kay,

Thank you so very much. Thank you for seeing my strength. Thank you for being proud of me. Yes, Kay I know and understand that it was not my fault in the slightest what went on with that therapist. This therapist took advantage of my vulnerable state and groomed me and then went on to exploit me. The shame, the fault rests with her. Initially, I took on some of the responsiblity, and is normal sadly in any case of predator and prey.

I agree society has along way to go when it comes to understanding that we are all human and belong to the same race.

I tried to go back to work on Tuesday and found I could not concentrate well enough and had to leave early. I was able to see my doctor and she gave me a note so I can claim some sick time and still receive my full wage. So I am not working at present and just letting the tears flow when they come. Yesterday I took one of our dogs from the shelter to the park and that was grand. In the evening I went to the long term care facility where I volunteer and played the piano and had a sing-a-long with the residents. Still miss my friend Raymond when I go there but know he is at rest now.

My Melissa is beaming with pride. Today I am writing her a letter. This is the first time since her death that I am not having to bring anyone to accountibility. IN some way it feels like she just died. I find myself weeping off an on and just letting it flow and know that yet even more healing is occuring.

Thank you so much Kay.

Courage and Blessings, Carol Ann