Heidi and all, I wanted to weigh in on this discussion, having lost my mom in February. Heidi-- I so empathize with your pain. I have gone to a grief counselor now for a few months, and have done a lot of talking and writing, and in some ways I have processed a lot, which is good. But in other ways, when I really look at it, I am no further along. People tell me it is early still, that it takes time. The pain is unbearable. I have taken a few trips out of town, and while it is no easier when I'm not home, it is harder coming back home. Thinking of what you shared, Heidi: I did clear my mother's house out before she died, because we thought she would need that money for her care. My mom had a stroke almost a year ago, the end of August 2014, and died six months later, after rehab facilities, standing up and falling down and the ER, board and cares, assisted living, a nursing home finally. Prior to this, she had been completely independent since my father's death 15 years earlier-- independent and mentally and physically active. I did the whole care thing pretty much on my own, with a little help from my brother and almost no help from my husband. I feel alone with my grief. I tried one support group, but it was not run well. I am signed up to try another in September and am hopeful there. But I restart teaching next week (I gave up my classes in February when we put my mom on hospice, so haven't taught since then.) I am afraid of taking this work on because I am having a hard time functioning. I choose to see this grief not as an emotional roller coaster, but rather like the tide, something more gentle, but still, it ravages me. I am comforted to know I am not alone and that you are dealing with it also. Almost six months since her death and I feel like I'm losing her every day I get further from the day she died. Cleo